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Adoption day | Regina Mills & Emma Swan

❤ "Adoption Day" ❤
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Regina Mills & Emma Swan
(Agere / Angst / hurt & comfort / fluff)
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It's past midnight currently in the orphanage. I watch the grandfather clock in the corner of the room ticking away until the finger hits number 12 and chimes. The loud noise making me jump slightly. The sound was almost eery, but I tried not to let it get the better of me. Its so cold within these old stone brick walls, I can barely sleep most nights...

It had been a long day, and all I could think about for the past few hours had been the traumatic ptsd flashbacks and sad memories from my childhood that have been flooding my mind, endlessly tormenting me.

Years ago, my parents had gotten into a terrible fatal driving accident. Both of them sadly perished in the blazing car fire. The whole memory was all sort of blurred together now though, due to how young I had been at the time, and how much time had passed since the incident. but I still think about that day when I get sad. I can remember them being drunk and distracted by my brother and I arguing in the backseat. How they had been shouting and swerving across the road almost hitting other vehicles in the process.

That's how the crash happened, and I blamed myself for it every day since. I couldn't bear the thought of being the reason why they died...

If only I hadn't been so stupid distracting them from driving. Maybe they would still be here if I had just kept quiet and behaved. If I had, maybe I wouldn't have been left to live all alone in this dump of a group home...maybe I'd have still had a family to love me and look after me.

I remember being pulled out of the wreckage by a squad of brave firemen after they had prized open the badly dented-in doors with their power tools to free me. The smashed windows, the smoke filling my lungs while trapped inside, the broken window glass shattered and thrown all across our bodies. I remember the screaming and car alarm blaring, and seeing my father's blood covered head resting against the airbag, completely unconscious. I felt powerless to be able to save them. The horrifying graphic visuals of my parents covered in blood would not be leaving my mind anytime soon....or ever, infact.

I wasn't the same after that day. It changed me as a person. I am no longer the 'happy little girl' my family raised. I just feel miserable and honestly, I feel SO alone some days that I start to question whether I even deserve to be the one who got out alive instead of my parents. They shouldn't have died, they didn't deserve to have their lives cut short so soon after starting their own family.... I  guess you could say that I feel alot of immense survivors guilt from it. Afterall, I had been the one to distract them from the road with my pathetic squabbling with my brother in the backseat...

After being saved from the wreckage, I was lifted out of my booster seat with a medical brace around my neck for support, and was swiftly handed over to the child protection services once I had been checked over by a paramedic.

Since I had been the only one to survive, I had now become a 'ward of the state'. An orphan if you will. And a two CPS men in uniform took me to a place of "safety".

They took me to an orphanage/group home until they could find an emergency placement who could take me in for good. Until then, I'd be stuck in this less than adequate, overcrowded and understaffed group home.

But sadly, that Foster family never came for me. I've spent years now hopefully waiting day after day for someone to love me, and to be given a home. But alas, my dreams were no use. Just empty hopes at most. The adoptive families who visited the childrens home never seemed to pay any kind of attention to me whatsoever. And nobody ever wanted to play with me, or pick me to be adopted...

So here I am, still stuck here years later, always feeling unwanted. I gave up on that dream of having a family eventually. I knew that if I were to ever get out of this place, then it would be once I age out of the system probably...the same unfortunate case for alot of other teens in the system.