Clato: The Cost of a Broken Heart

Chapter 24

CLOVE

The train is the same one that took us to the Games. It should freak me out, but it actually makes me feel better. At least they aren't pretending this is any different, that we are any different from the tributes we once were. There is still a death count. There are still only survivors.

Marian gives me a light sedative when Cordelia comes to get me. It doesn't knock me out but it dims my emotions like a light switch and makes it even harder than usual to concentrate. I spend most of the first day locked in my room with all my new clothes, dazedly staring at the ceiling. I'm avoiding Cato so this is probably a good thing.

The sedative is only just wearing off when Cordelia comes to get me for dinner. I lay unresponsively on the bed until Enobaria comes and drags me to the dining cart. The others are already there. I had planned to ignore Cato entirely but I physically can't make myself. My eyes are drawn to him. He looks like hell.

Cato's eyes are as bloodshot as mine, heavy bags beneath them. He has tape on one hand and dried blood behind his ear. Bruises stain his arms and face. He looks as though he's been beat up by about thirty muggers. Cato glances up at me and I look away.

We sit down and Cordelia starts prattling about the Victory Tour schedule. Twelve is tomorrow, then down in descending order, skipping two. We will visit the Capitol before going home and since there are two victors this year, Snow will be personally congratulating us at his ball. I can't wait.

The sedative hasn't worn off entirely so it's easy to sit and space off. I focus on a point past everything and don't respond to the conversation. I don't know why Cordelia and Enobaria wanted me here.

"Clove, eat something please," Enobaria says. I look at her blankly before setting my arm on the table with my wrist up. The gesture clearly says, "So feed me through a needle." I'd forgotten it was my right arm so they all see my tremor. Enobaria stares at me for a second until I slide my arm off and resume staring into space.

There are empty chairs at the end of the table but the more I stare at them, the less empty they become. Katniss, the girl who might have been in love with her district partner, smolders in the farthest chair. On either side of her are Marvel and Glimmer. Glimmer is grotesquely bloated from tracker jacker stings. My breathing turns shaky and I pull a pill from its container. Taking a sip of water, I swallow it whole.

When I look up, Cato is watching me with something like sadness on his face. I close my eyes and try to breathe.

"Clove, are you okay?" Asks Enobaria. I nod silently. I grip my fork so hard my fingers turn white. "Clove?" I can't answer, too consumed by the effort of holding it together. "I'm going to give her her meds now," Enobaria says to Brutus.

"No," I hear myself say, "please no." my voice cracks. Enobaria drags me limply from the room with the shot in hand. I go with because I don't want Cato to see me like this. Just before the door shuts behind me, I see him rise a little, as if he is going to come after me. But I told him not to save me, didn't I. Cato doesn't come. Enobaria slides the needle in and the clicking of the train on its tracks disappears.

CATO

What have they done to her? Clove spent the entire meal staring into space. She's gotten so thin and she wouldn't take a bite of food. I feel sick just thinking about it. What if she starves herself to death?

After they leave to go drug her up some more, I have an argument with Brutus. "What the hell are you doing to her?"

"She's in a state of shock, we just don't want her to hurt herself again."

"So drugging her up is the answer?" Brutus shakes his head tiredly and leaves the table. I want to help Clove, but I'm afraid I'll only make things worse after the way I treated her at Scarlet's funeral. I don't fall alseep until nearly 5:00am, when the snowy edges of district 12 appear in the distance.