Pretty Broken Butterfly

It Was Supposed To Be You

Stepping away, my body trembles as I fight the pain that is trying to eviscerate me. I wrap my arms tightly around myself as if that alone can hold me together.

"It was supposed to be you," I whisper. "You were the only person I wanted to have kids with. You were the one I was supposed to live out my days with."

I peer up at him.

I don't try to be strong. I don't try to stop the tears from flowing. With each drop that trails down my face, it takes this toxic bitterness with it. With each one that falls, a part of my fractured soul tries to patch itself together.

"Every tale has a final chapter, Keaton. You've just written our ending too soon, and I'm struggling to forgive you for it."

There's nothing left for me to say, and I don't have it in me to hear any response from him. So, I turn away, leaving him with the crushed pregnancy test in his hand.

Amelia has the basket full of tests in one hand and grabs my hand with the other, leading me away from one person my soul continuously cries out for.

When we're back in the car and on the way back to my place, I call Alek.

"Lollie-girl. Is everything okay?" he answers.

Of course. I never call him while he's at work. "Alek," I start. "Do you think you could meet me at my place?"

"What's going on, Charlie?" His voice is more alert, and I can hear him moving around his office.

"I have to take a pregnancy test and I need you to be here with me while I do."

"Shit. Okay. I'm on my way. Leaving work now."

"Kay," I whisper.

"Charlie," he calls before we end the call.

"Yeah?"

"I've got you, okay? You hear me?"

"I hear you."

"Be there soon. Wait for me. We do this together."

***

It didn't take long for Alek to make it to my place. As soon as he walks through the door, he wraps me in his arms, holding me tight and just being there.

After a few minutes, he kisses the top of my head and steps back, entwining his fingers with mine. "Ready?"

"No," I admit.

He blows out a breath, squeezing my hand. "Me either."

I pull him behind me to the bathroom and stop in front of the door. "You wait here. I'll go take them and then open the door when I finish. We'll wait to read them together."

Amelia walks into the bathroom with me and closes the door behind her. She opens the packages and gets the tests ready while I pull down my leggings and sit on the toilet.

I grab the first test with a shaking hand, uncap it, and put it in place. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and then relax my bladder.

I don't know how long it takes me to get through all the tests. My thoughts are fractured and unfocused as I stare blankly at the wall.

Once I'm done, Amelia takes hers, making sure to keep them in a separate area from mine. We wash our hands and then I open the door as she sets the timer.

Alek is leaning back against the wall, staring at his feet, one of his hands squeezing the back of his neck harshly. His head pops up as soon as he hears the bathroom door open and he straightens, stepping toward me to grab my hand and pull me to him.

"I'm sorry, Alek," I tell him, burying myself against his chest.

"Don't you dare fucking apologize, Charlie. I was right there with you. You weren't fucking yourself when the condom broke."

I glance up at him. "I swear I'm on birth control, Alek. I don't know what happened."

He leans away so that he can grasp my chin. "Shit happens, babe. Sometimes things fail." His eyes roam my face. "How are you feeling about this?"

"Sad. Scared. Angry. It wasn't supposed to be you, Alek," I whisper.

I wipe the tears that began their journey down my face again. "But it is. How are you feeling?"

Alek laughs sharply. "Fucking terrified. What the fuck do I know about being a goddamn dad, Char? It's not like I had a wonderful role model growing up."

I can feel Amelia slowly beginning to freak out on the other side of me, so I turn to her. "Look at me, Mel." When she does, I stare at her fiercely, letting her see all the love I have for her in my eyes. "No matter what these say, we're in this together. You feel me? No matter what they say."

Her hand reaches out for mine and I let her take it, knowing we both need this lifeline right now.

The hallway fills with quiet as the three of us stare into the bathroom at the counter filled with tests until the timer Amelia set blares, shattering the silence.

Alek is the one who steps forward when mine and Amelia's feet don't move. He glances over his shoulder, beckoning us to follow. So, I tighten my fingers around Amelia's and follow him inside.

I stand between Alek and Amelia as we all stare down at the results of our tests. Numbness bleeds into me as I read each one. Alek wraps me tightly in his arms as my body shakes.

"Are you going to tell Keaton?" he asks quietly and I can't get a read on emotions.

"Maybe. Not sure if he deserves to know."

"Whatever you decide, I'll support your decision."

Turning in his arms, I look up at him. His features blur from the tears falling from my eyes. Even through my emptiness, I find it in me to give him a small smile. Leaning up on my toes, I brush my lips across his in a friendly kiss.

"You're going to make a really great dad, Alek," I tell him, watching his eyes do a million different things behind them.

I turn toward Amelia, once again reaching over to grab her hand as I spot the result on hers, too. "Together, Amelia Shae. We're in this together."

When she finally looks away from the test and over at me, her eyes are yelling at me.

It seems that we're going to be a little broken together.

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A/N: Please don't bring your pitchforks! Lol. I promise the next chapter will give you some closure. Another promise I'm making to you: I will have it to you in a couple days so that you don't have to wait long. I don't normally write cliffhangers, but these characters made me stop there. Blame them!!

Love to you all!