The Disastrous Life of Saiki K || Saiki Kusuo x OC Male Reader

The Statue Incident [1/2]

"Guess what everybody! School festival timeee~!" Hairo stood at the front of the class, excitement flowing out of him. However his classmates barely made noises of acknowledgment. "Awh, c'mon guys! Start shooting some ideas at me!" He tried to get his classmates to match his energy. "A maid café!" Some guy said too enthusiastically, slamming his desk in the process. "Absolutely not." The teacher said shutting it down immediately. "What about a bake sale?" Mera suggested. Some people snickered, "You? Bake? Please, that's too funny!"
"Yeah, all you'd do is eat the batter before we would've even been able to cook it!"
"What a glutton." The girls laughed at the comments. Mera sunk back into her chair. "Mera I like your idea, however I don't these boys know anything about being in a kitchen so I'm gonna have to pass on that idea." Hairo glared at the boys picking on her. "Oh, that's alright. I think I have work that day anyway." She tried to make Hairo less awkward.

Mera had blocked out all outside noise, she knew that they were discussing whether or not to do a rock display because some dickhead threw one in her direction. The boy's giggles were silenced when Hairo slammed his fist on the podium in front of him, "I've had just about enough of your bullshit. Cut it out before this gets ugly." His words sliced through the air, "Anyway, the rock display is such a stupid idea. How about we all make 1,000 (one thousand) paper cranes! Which will equal 36,000 cranes (thirty six thousand)! Oh, even better, lets all do 1,389 (one thousand three hundred and eighty nine)!"

'...You've gotta be kidding me.' Kei couldn't do origami for shit. "I know. I don't think even he could persuade them to make even 300."  Kusuo could knock out the 36,000 in less than three minuets, but that idea is kind of stupid. Some guy tried to suggest the maid café again, but Yumehara went one step further and turned it into a cross dressing café. "What? I wouldn't even know how to put a bra on, or how to do makeup. And aren't dresses to girly?" Takahashi squealed. That put the boys off of any ideas they had. "...Well, alright then. Teruhashi, do you have any ideas?" Hairo asked her.

Pure panic was written on her face and Kei was living for it. "What about a planetarium? Like we have a projector displaying stars and constellations." Teruhashi said with a dreamy look in her eyes, she had someone in mind for this. "Oh, and we can add some food in there as well!" Yumehara added on to Teruhashi's idea. "Hmm, it's a good idea but I don't think a whole class should be baking when the primary thing is going to be based on a machine. We need an idea that requires us to be using every fibre of our being!!" Hairo reluctantly replied. With that, he got bombarded by the other boys in his class because they believe that Teruhashi is love, Teruhashi is life, and she can do no wrong.

Hairo tried to break the back and forth he was having with these boys by asking Kuboyasu what he thought their class attraction should be, "What about a haunted house?" "Nah that ideas dumb, besides it's not even halloween." One kid said smugly. A few more discussions went around on what the class could do, but none were very successful. 'I think this is giving me a headache.' Kei rubbed his temples absentmindedly. "Honestly, they're acting like a bunch of rowdy babies." Kusuo sighed. He wanted to go home. With his trusty physic powers (psychokinesis*) he summoned a rock from outer space to crash into his classroom. His classmates attention was dragged to the rock and someone finally said something reasonable, "Let's make this our display! A meteorite!"

"But isn't having just one rock a lil weird? Even if it is from space?" Hasegawa tapped Hairo's shoulder to grab his attention without disrupting the rest of the class. "You're right but.." Hairo looked around nervously, "Bingo! Class 3 will display the meteorite and funky looking rocks found in the school yard!" He said, too much enthusiasm shouting in Kei's ear. The class cheered gleefully, they didn't want to be here any longer to be honest.

'Babe, could you help me get home please?' Kei looked like he was in a lot of pain. "Of course, love. Is something the matter?" Kusuo asked, teleporting them away at the first opportunity. 'Just a headache.' Kei kissed his boyfriend, thanked him for the ride home, and went inside to take a nap. Kei flicked a message to his parents, who were at work, explaining why he would be taking a nap when they got home. Kei curled into his bed, not bothering to take his uniform off.
"...Want some company?" Kei smiled and opened his arms. They fell in a comfortable silence before Kusuo turned away from him. 'Embarrassed are we?' "Shut up." Kusuo felt comfortable and safe in Kei's arms. It was a sense of security he hadn't felt before.

•Next Day•

"Hey Hairo! Did you find any good ones?" Kuboyasu wondered. "Yeah, I found just a few." He sounded rather disappointed, but the rocks he found was tennis racket shaped and dragon shaped. "This idea was kinda easy and stupid." 'Yes, but don't you think it was well executed?' Saiki tossed around the sphere shaped rock he had in his hands while Hasegawa admired his moon shaped rock. "Hey Hasegawa, where'd you find something like that?" Teruhahsi asked amazed. "I found it near my house, isn't it cool?" He responded, nearly dropping it in the process of getting his phone out.

"Excuse me! I need Saiki!" Toristuka interrupted.
"What is it?"
"Oh you guys are displaying rocks? That cool, we're doing a cross-dressing café. But that's not what I'm here for. Right, focus! Okay, so I kinda need your help."
"Just spit it out."
"I want you to join our band!"
"Absolutely not."
"Please! ...None of us know how to play, does that change your mind?"
Saiki was gobsmacked, who would form a band if none of the members know who to play?! Toristuka led Saiki to his class and introduced his band mates.
"With your help we could have the crowd cheering our names! We'd be legends!" Toristuka pleaded. His band mates tired to convince Saiki to help as well. "Look, I already said no." Saiki's patience was growing thin. "Fine, fine. But it would be a shame if the school found out that half their students got teleported out to sea in Okinawa, don't you think?"

"You think you've got the upper hand?" He was about to tear Toristuka to shreds when Hasegawa ran over, 'Hold on! Kusuo calm down! And you, shut your rucking mouth. That wouldn't have happened if you had kept a closer eye on what Teruhashi was doing. Yeah, I saw that you were following her, and I also know what you were trying to accomplish.' Toristuka looked like he was going to wet himself, he was so nervous. "Alright sorry! Saiki, could you please help us?" Toristuka begged for his life. Saiki sighed and agreed. He used his telepathy to send rock music into the brains of Toristuka's band, and if they practiced at least twice, they would realise they had no musical talent. 'That's evil. I love it.'
"Of course you would. Anyway, did you need something?"
'Oh, Hairo just wants the people who have already found rocks to put them in classroom; something about them being safer there.' Kei said with a shrug, walking back to their classroom.
"Good grief, this is tiresome."
'Well, at least we aren't cross-dressing.'
"If you wanna wear a dress just do it."
'Says Mr. Shape-shift.'
The two had a back and forth 'argument' until they got to class.

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*psychokinesis = to be able to move objects by mental effort alone (like telekinesis)