I emailed my ex a picture of my girlfriend because she's awesome and I want everyone I know to know about her, and the conversation went like this:
T: This is why I'm glad to be a straight dude instead of a bisexual dude
C: Yeah, as straight as the pole your mother dances on. 🙄 Y'know that doesn't even make sense, right? Because she's a chick, and you're a dude, which makes that straight.
T: At least my mom doesn't look like she's battling cancer
C: At least my mom gives a flying fuck about me. And I'll have you know my mother's hair is goddamn BEAUTIFUL and your hair looks like you got into a fight with a raccoon and lost horribly, which also accounts for your face. And the raccoon may have torn your amygdala to ribbons, but that's not at all an okay thing to say. You think you're sOooOo funny, huh?
T: You may have a mom who gives a flying fuck about you, but at least I have a loving dad 😂😂😂And where's your dad?
