𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐈𝐬 𝐀 𝐏𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐎𝐧 𝐄𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐡

𝖘𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧

He looked around wildly for a second, I guess observing his surroundings, and then his eyes fell on me.

For a moment things were just quiet—like literally silent with nothing but the rain from outside making noise.

"A-are you okay..." I questioned finally, tone low but high in sincerity.

His gaze lingered on me for a bit, then he tore it away and looked at the ground for a couple of seconds.

That again only lasted momentarily before he hopped up and walked out of the living room area.

Once I heard the bathroom door shut I realized that's where he'd gone, and as usual, I was left in my solitude with nothing but confusion.

I don't think I've ever seen him like that. That face he made when he woke up looked like genuine fear, that's right—he actually looked scared.

What made it even more confusing was the fact the only name he said was "mom", which didn't do much to help me understand what was happening.

I didn't know anything about his family, and to be fair he didn't know much about mine, we just hadn't discussed it yet—we've been a little preoccupied with just about everything else.

My thoughts were cut off when returned to the living room, looking just about everywhere but my eyes.

"You can go back to bed." He stated simply, returning to his position on the couch.

"Are you okay?" I asked again.

"I'm straight." He said simply.

"Are you sure—it sounded like you were having a nightma—"

"yo, just let it fuckin' go." He sighed, "you always gotta ask shit, if I said I'm good then I'm good—it was nothin', go back to bed."

I blinked and tucked my lips after that, not really sure what else to do or say that would help this situation.

It's like even when I tried to help or to understand him more, he'd just shut me down.

I don't really understand what he wanted out of this, A couple of days ago he said he wanted to be my friend, but lately, it's like we're back to square one.

Eventually though I gave in to his wishes, after grabbing my water bottle from the nightstand I went ahead and made my way back to the bedroom.

I didn't close the door this time, I guess deep down I wanted to be able to hear if Saint had another nightmare, just so I could help—though I doubt he'd even want it.

As I climbed back onto the bed, I sat crisscross in front of the window, gazing out to the city ahead.

At night it usually looked scary, but under the heavy rain, I don't know, it looked more mysterious than anything.

It felt like a portion of the city was constantly on fire, but now the sky was grey with fog as the wind howled into the night.

Thunder
Rain
Fog
Wind

This was Hell on earth and I was in the center of it, the heart of it, laying in the bed of someone who embodied the very essence of it.

I couldn't do it anymore, I can't do this anymore.

It's been about two months of me living here now. Two months of torture, terror, and agonizing turmoil...

And all for what—because I dared to try and live a life of my own?

No, No Dad was right, Mom was right, they were both right... I can't live like this—it wasn't right, and if anything, this was the proof.

This was the punishment I deserved for trying to live my own life.