Too Far Gone (Don't Save Me Book 4)

Chapter 13: Neville

"Professor?" Neville's timid voice pulled me from my thoughts. Class was over and I thought all the students were leaving so I'd allowed my mind to wander only briefly.

"Yes, sorry, Mr. Longbottom. What can I do for you?"

"I uh... I wanted to talk with you... privately," he added, his eyes flashing to Severus briefly.

"Will you give us a moment?" I asked Severus, who nodded and left the room without another word as I turned to Neville. "What is it, dear?"

"This is probably way out of line and you can tell me to sod off but... I read about what your uncle did and I just... I wondered... how did you not go insane?"

My face fell as I knew exactly what he was trying to ask: how did his parents go insane when I didn't?

I placed a hand on his and he continued. "She... she tortured them and they went insane... I just... w-was there something we could've done? Were they not strong enough?"

I gently squeezed his hand. "No, Neville. Look at me. Your parents were some of the strongest people I knew. What you read about... what my uncle did... it was short intervals, dear... but when Bellatrix..." I sighed, trying to find a way to word this that wouldn't hurt him any further. "When she tortured them... it was continuous... It was hours of the Cruciatus curse nonstop. Yet, your parents never relented."

"I know, I know... I should be proud of them for their sacrifice and-."

"No, dear... no." I squeezed his hand and I could see the tears forming in his eyes. "Of course what they did was very brave, but Neville... it is okay to feel however you feel about what happened. There is no right or wrong way to feel, dear. What happened to them was horrible."

"My grandmother always says I should be proud of them and I am but... it's like she's upset that I don't want people to know."

"You don't want them to treat you any different."

He nodded and I smiled softly at him.

"I suppose you understand that feeling... with what you went through... n-not that they're the same thing!" he rushed to explain. "What happened to you was awful and-."

"Neville, it's alright. Both situations were awful... but your parents would be so proud of you."

"Y-you think?"

"I know," I replied, recalling them from our days in the Order before their torture. "They were so excited when you were born. They knew you were going to be a great wizard."

He scoffed. "At least we know they aren't seers."

I chuckled. "Neville, you are a great wizard. I've heard about your aptitude for herbology from Professor Sprout and your other professors believe you have potential."

He smiled but there was still a sadness behind his eyes. Suddenly a thought occurred to me as I remembered seeing him in the DA, practicing with a wand that looked awfully familiar.

"Neville... may I see your wand?"

He seemed confused but took it out nonetheless, handing it to me. I instantly recognized it as I'd been on the receiving end of it multiple times in practice duels with Frank Longbottom.

"Oh, Neville... I'm sure you're aware this is your father's wand."

He nodded.

"Why didn't you get your own, dear?"

"My gran gave it to me and... well, we didn't have much money so we thought I'd just use his."

"The wand chooses the wizard, Neville... I'm sure you know that."

He nodded and I continued.

"It's not your magical ability, dear... it's your wand. It won't work for you the same way it worked for your father."

I reached into my pocket, pulling out several galleons and handing them to Neville."

"Professor, I-."

"It's alright, Neville. You are Harry's friend and more than that... you're the son of two of my closest friends. They would want to live up to your full potential. Over the break go and get yourself a new wand. If anyone asks, you picked up a job and earned a little extra money, alright?"

He nodded, his eyes filling with tears. "I-I'll pay you back, professor! I promise."

I waved my hand. "No need, Neville. Just go and get yourself a proper wand... one that speaks to you." I handed him back his father's wand. "Keep this somewhere safe."

He thanked me again before apologizing for asking about my past.

"It's alright, Neville. It's no longer a secret. It's perfectly natural to be curious."

He smiled before leaning close and whispering a few final words. "The DA lives." With that he left the room, smiling softly and closing the door behind him.