The Collector

Chapter Twenty-Six

The ride home was quiet despite the success of the mission. Jason handed the encryption key to Batman and settled into the front seat. Occasionally, he would take a sly glance into the back. Robin would meet his eye silently; then they would glance over at Dick, huddled into the side of the car, his head leaning against the darkened windows with his eyes tightly closed. As soon as they had arrived home, their newest counterpart had disappeared upstairs and out into the garden.

'Is he okay?' Tim asked.

'Might be an idea to give Dinah a call, keep her on standby,' Jason said, pursing his lips as he looked at their mentor. Batman nodded and went to the computer. Jason slapped Tim on the shoulder. 'You get dressed; I'm going to make sure Dickie Bird has enough cigarettes to get him through the night.' He had quietly kept Dick supplied with cigarettes since his first few weeks living with them. Bruce had never questioned it; somewhere along the line, Jason realised he had become Bruce's best tool for predicting Dick's moods and needs. He tried not to think about it too much, and when he did, it brought forward unwanted memories of his mother. They were memories he had come to terms with; he knew his mother's death was not his fault. But he knew if he let them come to the surface in the present moment, he would become paranoid about Richard, which would not help them in the long term. He had to remain in the present moment and remain in control. He had to do what he could to help his friend, but he also knew there was a high probability that this would all end badly. It pained him even to consider that he could lose Dick the same way he lost his mother, but a part of him knew that to get through this, he had to accept that it was out of his control, and whatever the outcome, he was not to blame.

Picking up a jacket from the coat closet on his way through the kitchen, Jason walked out into the garden, biting back a shiver as the cold night air hit him again. Dick was sat on the garden wall, knees up to his chest, his fingernails gripping tightly into his arms. Jay approached him and dropped the coat around his shoulders. The older boy looked up at him, pulling the coat around himself tighter with a nod of thanks.

'How are you holding up?' Jason asked. Dick shrugged and drew his knees into his chest tighter.

'I'd almost forgotten how intense it feels in there. Or maybe it just feels worse because I was sober. I swear being in that club has never felt so physically painful.' A shiver passed through him that had nothing to do with the chill. 'I feel too god damn sober.'

'Not going to lie, that place is a viper pit. Even I was having a hard time being in there. Everyone was numbing themselves, so it was a very intense experience for the senses. You probably just never fully noticed before.' He smiled gently, offering him a cigarette. 'You did well.'

Dick stared at the offered packet and sighed, taking one and balancing it between his teeth. 'You know I haven't had one of these in two days.'

'I did notice the packet was going down slower than usual,' Jason said, passing him a lighter.

'Thought I'd give complete sobriety a go...so much for that.' He lit the cigarette and gave Jason his lighter back, inhaling deeply before sighing out the smoke.

'One step at a time,' Jason said gently, placing the remaining packet on the wall between them. They sat silently for a few minutes, the smoke from their cigarette drifting up and dispersing into the night air. 'For right now, let's just get you through tonight.'

'I'm all right,' Dick said hesitantly. 'Being back here is helping. Feels like something is cushioning the impact.'

'Well, that's good. Means you associate home with feeling safe.' Jason didn't realise the weight of his words until he saw Dick's eyebrows raise and contemplation spread over his face.