♡Maybe I Don't Hate You | Yeongyu/Beomjun♡

Yeonjun's POV | 18

When the police reached us, I think they realised the situation pretty fast. They took the first guy I beat up and threw him into the cop car. I quickly helped untie Beomgyu and get his  pants back on. I don't know where his shirt went, so I dressed him with my hoodie. As soon as I wrapped my arms around his small body, his legs weakened and he fell to the ground. He cradled himself, holding his knees, and I hugged him as tight as I could. His body jerked each time he sobbed, and he clung onto me so tight. What did he ever do to deserve this? It hurt so much to see him like this.

It's all my fault.

I should've gone in with him.

I should've realised the situation sooner.

I should've have never let him go on his own.

"Yeonjun..." he sobbed, "I'm sorry."

I squeezed him tighter and started SOOBING with him. "I'm sorry Beomgyu!" I cried out. "I'm so sorry, it's all my fault! Beomgyu please forgive me!" I cried so much, my head began to ache.

We were brought back to the police station, and they asked us questions about the incident, and I provided them all with answers. Apparently, those two men have been arrested for the same crime before, which made me a lot more angry than I already was.

The cops drove us back to my apartment once everything was done, and they told me I could pick up my car the next day. (The convenience store was close enough to walk)

Immediately, when Beomgyu got inside, he headed straight for the shower. Poor boy.

Instead of following him in there like I normally would, I decided to give him some space and wait at the couch.

"I'll be on the couch baby." I said through the crack of the door, before sitting down.

I could still hear him crying in the shower, and he was in there for about 30 minutes, must likely trying to get rid of the filthy feeling he had left over from the men.

This was enough to make me kill myself, or to at least attempt it. How am I supposed to live with myself when I'm the reason my boyfriend got sexually assaulted? I know he's traumatised, so an added death in his life would probably kill him too.

He finally walked out in a towel, and headed straight to my room.

"I'm gonna go get dressed..."

"Take your time Beomms."

I should probably shower too.

I walked into the bathroom and I noticed that he wrote on the mirror. It was still visible because the bathroom was still foggy. I saw so many horrible words he used to describe himself.

"Slut."

"Whore."

"Bitch."

"Dirty."

"Weak."

The list goes on. As soon as I was about to start the water, I heard a knock on the door.

"Can I come in?"

"Of course baby, you don't need to ask. What's wrong?"

"I don't wanna be by myself..." he whined, all sniffly.

He walked in and closed the door, locking it. He then just sat in the corner of the bathroom in silence, watching as I washed my body.

"Give me that towel?" I asked.

"Okay." He handed it to me.

"Thanks my love."

I walked out, and he closely followed my to my room, where I looked for pajamas to wear. He closed the door, and locked it.

"Beomgyu... baby... I'm so sorry. I should've been there earlier. And I'm so fucking dumb for letting you go in there alone. I thought that being able to see you was enough..."

"Yeonjun..."

"I won't let it happen again Beomms, I promise."

"Yeonjun, I'm sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry, Beomgyu, also my apartment is a safe space. Don't worry about needing to follow me everywhere. If that makes you feel more comfortable, then go for it. But if I'm in the kitchen, and you're in the TV room, that's okay too."

"Okay." He said, plopping himself onto the bed, curling himself up into a ball. His eyes were red, his face was puffy, and his voice was raspy.

"My poor baby..." I joined him on the bed and embraced him even tighter than I did earlier. I stroked his soft hair, and held him close to my bare chest. He nuzzled himself further into my neck, and before I knew it, he was out.

How could I ever fucking forgive myself for what happened to him...

Shit. All the lights were still on, and I was not trynna raise the electricity bill overnight, but I needed to find a way to get out of the bed without waking Beomgyu up. I slowly slid away from him and pried his fingers off of my limbs, and slowly and carefully scooted out of the bed.

Kitchen lights: off

Bathroom lights: off

TV room lights: off

Doorway lights: off

Finally, oh my god. I quietly walked back into my room to find Beomgyu sitting upright, his eyes only half open.

"Yeonjun, where did you go?" He said sleepily.

"I needed to turn off the lights." I replied.

I turned off the bedroom light, then walked over, turning the lamp off last.

"I need to take off my shirt too," he said, "I need to feel your heartbeat in my heart too."

Aww...

His soft body was covered in (luckily minor) bruises, which I hadn't seen before. I decided it would be best if I didn't comment on them though. I just held him tight, and watched as he slowly closed his eyes and fell onto a deep sleep.

Goodnight my love.