One Night Only

Cheryl taps on her empty glass with perfectly manicured nails. She had just downed the last gulp of a Cosmopolitan. Her date was an hour late, Cheryl had resigned to the fact that she'd been stood up. This wasn't a first, she just swipes based on proximity, no expectations and definitely no time for small talk. Cheryl had driven from Subang Jaya to central KL for this. The waiter asks her if she wants anything else.

"One bunga raya cocktail, please." Cheryl was a fan of drinks with a local twist.

The view from the rooftop was breathtaking, Cheryl had a fondness for the KL skyline despite being an expatriate. She does consider herself to be local, learning Bahasa Malaysia and Cantonese to communicate effectively. Malaysians are notoriously skilful at mixing and switching languages. The cocktail felt cooling against her throat, a hibiscus flavour stronger than she'd expected but still palatable.

Cheryl feels someone tapping on her shoulder, it's quite unusual for Malaysians to initiate bodily contact for no reason. "You're late!", Cheryl mutters under her breath, assuming that it's her date.

"Am I?", a petite brunette says with one eyebrow raised. Cheryl loses balance slightly upon the realisation that it's Toni Topaz. Toni's black mesh halter neck bodysuit was a little risqué for Malaysia but appropriate for a night out, Cheryl supposes.

"Toni..."

"Can I sit with you?" Toni waves her own drink, Rumble in the Jungle, at Cheryl. Cheryl could smell the pandan-infused rum and nods.

"What are the chances?" Cheryl states, not really expecting a response. Cheryl could sense a palpable tension in the air, a neutral one.

"You look gorgeous." Toni says, engaging in direct eye contact. Cheryl fixes her hair, not really sure what to do with her hands. Toni had that effect on her.

"Well, it wasn't for you." Cheryl says. They both burst into laughter.

'Even after all this time, the banter still warms my heart.' Cheryl thinks to herself, gesturing to the waiter to bring them some nibbles. He also brings a carafe of iced water.

"Don't go for the nuts, you're in Malaysia!" Cheryl rolls her eyes at Toni proceeds to cautiously bite on a mini chicken satay skewer. "What are you doing in Malaysia?"

"I have to admit, I saw your post on FaceNovel. I just had a feeling." Toni explains, covering her mouth until she had finished chewing the morsels of food.

"So you're on holiday?" Cheryl was always one to be blunt.

"A solo trip but it's my last night. Live, love and laugh kinda thing. I can't even remember the last time we met." Toni's eyes were still locked on Cheryl's gaze but a part of Cheryl wished it would wander. Cheryl was wearing her red cheongsam/ qipao, it was the only thing left in her wardrobe until laundry day.

"I'm glad you're here." Cheryl gives Toni a knowing look. They pay the bill and head towards Bukit Bintang to sober up. Toni recognises Cheryl's perfume, it was the same signature floral smell she knew so well. They link arms so that Toni doesn't get lost in the crowd. The food stalls along Jalan Alor were enticing but not enough for them to sit down.

"Do you wanna sit by KLCC? The water fountains always look good at night."

The twenty minute walk felt like five because Toni was listening to Cheryl talk about her failed attempt at dating this evening.

"Am I oversharing?" Cheryl notices that she had been talking more than Toni. Toni shakes her head, happy to be lending her ears.

"You haven't changed at all." Toni smirks, as they take a seat near the KLCC esplanade. "Have you thought about us?"

Cheryl takes a deep breath, the tips of their fingers intertwine. Cheryl notices Toni inspecting her face, every single wrinkle and freckle. Cheryl notices Toni sweating, her bangs were frayed from moisture plus a light breeze. "Sometimes."

"What do you think about when you think about us?" Toni rests her head on Cheryl's shoulder, fitting perfectly in nook of the redhead's neck.

"I think about the day we gave up on us." Cheryl feels Toni's head moving in closer rather than retreating. "It's vivid- we fought over something stupid and the next thing I know, I'm in Malaysia and you were in..."

"Riverdale. Middle of nowhere, I met Tabitha and we had a dog."

"How's Tabitha?"

"We've separated amicably, if that's even a thing. What about you...?"

"I don't think I've clicked with anyone. The way I have with you. That could explain why I haven't been married."

"And you chose a country where they criminalise homosexuality...interesting."

"These laws were enacted under British colonial rule." Cheryl felt a responsibility to clarify this, Malaysia had become a second home to her and Toni was probably used to a Western depiction of Southeast Asia.

"I don't want to be alone tonight."

*****

Cheryl follows Toni to her hotel room, it's a fancy 5-star hotel where they didn't have to be discreet. Cheryl was still wondering what Toni meant about not wanting to be alone, it was unlike Toni to be spontaneous. The hotel suite was at least executive standard with the bedroom set-up for bedtime, there was a calming musky incense smell. Slippers were placed by the edge of the bed and there was even a pillow menu.

"Cheryl, I didn't want you to think this was for-"

'I can't say I wasn't thinking about it.', Cheryl was too fixated on her accelerated heartbeat to notice what Toni had said. Cheryl sits at the end of the bed, awaiting instructions.

"You can relax." Toni laughs, standing in front of Cheryl. Cheryl pulls Toni on top of her like a weighted blanket.

"Let me ask- what do you think about us?" Cheryl could feel the friction between the mesh of Toni's bodysuit against her silk ensemble.

"It's silly." Toni attempts to support her body weight by extending her arms. Cheryl feels a wave of déjà vu , omitting the fact that she had felt lonely for the past twenty years. There was a Toni-shaped void everywhere, when she needed someone to talk to after a shit day at work, watching late night tv on the sofa with and someone to come home to.

"It's mainly regret. I realise that I've been holding onto you which has complicated things. Tabitha told me that she had felt alone in a bed made for two. I was more afraid to die alone than to hurt someone else." Toni's arms give up on her so she rolls to Cheryl's side. They're both laid on their backs, dying to get undressed as their outfits were hanging on like cling film. "I can't make the same mistake twice."

"No other options make sense."

Cheryl and Toni share a kiss, one which feels like it's happening in slow motion. It reassured them that one thing can withstand the test of time. Love.

*****

I would risk it all, just to feel your touch

I just want it all, if it ain't too much