Way Down we Go (Male OC/Reader)

30. Lil' Ass Kicker

We round a corner and see two walkers digging into a body, their faces red with blood. Most of the skin from the body had been eaten, but there was enough left for me to make out the face. T-Dog. I covered my mouth with my free hand. Don't throw up, don't throw up, don't throw up. In all the commotion I had forgotten about T being bit. And now here he was, eaten to death by rotters. 

My emotions spiraled into a mess of anger and grief as I stabbed the machete into both of the walkers heads, watching them fall onto T's body. I had know T-Dog for 10 months, he had become someone I trusted, and now he was gone. Tears pricked my eyes, but I pushed them down. No one else was crying, so I shouldn't either. Crying was weak.

I felt a hand softly touch my shoulder, and I turned around to see Rick looking at me, his eyes tired and full of sadness. Daryl walked over to near T's body, and picked up a scarf that had been discarded on the ground, showing it to the group. Oh no, not Carol too. 

I had known Carol for the same amount of time as T-Dog, a few hours less, if that even mattered. She was always quiet, scared of everything. But over the months on the road, she became almost fearless, ready to kill anything or anyone that put the group in danger. 

That's what I admired about her, she overcame her grief and adapted, something I couldn't do. And now she was gone, and I was still alive.  She should be the one living right now, not me.

Everyone's speechless, trying to let the situation sink in. We had lost two people from our group, maybe more, we wouldn't know for sure until we went back outside. 

So that's what we did, walking through the corridors in silence, coming out onto the courtyard where Hershel and Beth still were. No one else had made it out though, which made my stomach tighten with anxiety.

"Hershel!" Rick called. Hershel turned around and began walking towards us.

"You didn't find them?" Hershel asked, looking at our group.

"We thought maybe they came back out here." Glenn mentioned.

"What about T, Carol?" Hershel said.

I opened my mouth to tell him, but I couldn't get any words out, so I closed it again. Daryl noticed I was struggling, so he stood forward.

"They didn't make it." Daryl said, no emotion, no indication that their deaths effected him. 

That's what I needed to be able to do, but I couldn't. He loved Carol, more than anyone else in our group, more than me. Her death hurt him more than it did any of us, but he was able to stay strong. Whereas me on the other hand, I turned into a chaotic mess, not being able to think straight.

"That doesn't mean the others didn't." Rick said, determination in his voice. He was worried for Lori, and so was I. "We're going back! Daryl, Glenn, Y/N, you come with me..."

He was cut off by the sound of a baby's cry. But there was no babies in our group. Lori. She must've given birth. I smiled and turned around, ready to help her, but when I did, she wasn't there. Instead, it was Carl and Maggie. Maggie had a newborn baby cradled in her hands, which were covered in blood. Her face was stained with tears. I couldn't even see Carl's face, he was staring at the ground. 

My heart sank and my smile vanished. No, not Lori too. 

"Where is... where is she?" Rick's voice wavered, choking back a sob. 

He started walking back into the prison, but Maggie reached out one of her hands and tried to pull him back, cradling the baby close to her chest.

"No, Rick, don't!" She cried as he kept walking, falling out of her grasp.