Steal My Girl || Andy Goldfarb

6

"Okay, today we will be talking about tikkun olam," Rabbi Rebecca tells us, "Does anyone know what that means?"

I raise my hand and begin to explain that it is repairing the world and Rabbi Rebecca is impressed with my knowledge. "Great job, Lila!" She says.

Then Kym raises her hand and asks, "If God exists, then how do you explain climate change?"

"That's actually an amazing question-" She begins to answer before Tara interrupts and asks, "Yeah, and why can't straight people get on gay tiktok? It's way funnier." 

"And if God loves me, then why is he always giving me so many zits?" My brother asks to which I reply saying, "Maybe it's because of all the greasy food you eat?"

"And why does Apple keep changing their chargers?" Devin asks.

"And why did my dad's doctor operate on the wrong shoulder?" Some girl in the back asks.

"And why do I have to share a room with my grandma?" Some kid up front asks.

"And why do I have to take pills to make me happy?" I ask under my breath, but my brother hears and turns and shrugs at me.

"Okay, okay, okay. I think I can explain zits and climate change and gay tiktok," Rabbi Rebecca starts, before pulling out maracas and yelling, "Musically!!!"

She breaks out into a song about how God is random and not everyone can live a perfect life, in fact, no one can. I look back and hear the two love birds giggling, cringing at how annoying Lydia's laugh is. She is such a two-faced whore.

My phone buzzes and I see a text from Stacy pop up. I open it and see she just said "u see those to" to which I reply, "ya so cringe lmao"

"I just did smth a little silly" she writes back.

"stacy," I reply, "what did u do"

"I may or may not have told the rumors acc that lydia has long black nipple hair..."

"OMG THATS SO FUNNY JKAHKJSGHKGDSHJGS"

"Seema! Elkie!" Rabbi Rebecca yells our Hebrew names, causing both of us to drop our phones onto the floor. "What did Rabbi Rebecca say about being on your phone?" She asks us, "Right? Aaron knows what I'm talking about. Come on, dude," She says before dapping him up again. "Yup, Baruch HaShem, Aaron."

"Yes, sir," Aaron replies.

Me and Stacy are sitting in Rabbi Rebecca's office as she walks on her treadmill, "All right, what's going on young ladies? You used to be such a good, respectful kid. I mean, Lila you answered a question no one else bothered to even try to answer just an hour ago. Now you're on your phone. You're not practicing your portion, not you, Lila, I know you already finished everything. Talk to me, sis. What's crappenin. Do you know what your portion is about? Do you understand Ki Tisa?"

"Yeah lots of golden calf talk and stuff like that," Stacy answers.

"Yeah but it's also about becoming your own, individual person. And Lila, it seems like all you care about nowadays is how you look."

"That's not true, I also care about Stacy," I say scrunching my eyebrows.

"Okay, back to you Stacy. It's about taking responsibility for your mistakes. You know, grown-up stuff? Let me take a wild guess. You haven't started your mitzvah project yet either, huh?" She asks us.

"I'm narrowing it down," Stacy responds.

"Seema, I'm telling you, the sooner you do your mitzvah, which is a good deed, a commandment by the way, the sooner you will find things falling into place."

"Wait so if I do a mitzvah, God will reward me?" Stacy asks.

"Totally not what she said," I reply.

"No not reward,"

"And he'll give me what I want?" Stacy adds on.

"Well, I definitely did not say that."

"No, thank you, Rabbi. You helped me so much. I gotta get to work. Come on Lila, let's get Aaro- I mean Mat- I mean Andy back!!"

"Wait. No, no no!" She calls after us.

"Gotta start my journey, Rabbi Rebecca!" Stacy calls from the door.

The next day during lunch me and Stacy started brainstorming what we were going to do for her project, "You can raise money for the mental hospital, or like do a mass dog adoption or something." I suggest.

"No, that's too basic. What if I make friendship bracelets for dogs?" She asks when Lydia comes up to our table and asks if she can sit there with some girl. 

"Perfect," Stacy whispers before getting up and walking over to where Lydia is sitting.

"Hey," Stacy says.

"You guys wouldn't happen to know why people keep asking  me if they can floss their teeth with my nipple hair today, do you, Stacy, what about you, Lila, care to share something with the class?" Lydia asks causing me to have to hold back a smile, seeing Stacy struggling to do the same.

"Uh, no," She answers suspiciously.

"You know seventh grade is hard enough without people pointing and laughing at me whenever I walk down the halls screaming, "Here comes spider nips!" Lydia whines.

"Better than here comes Aunt Flow and the blood pads!" Stacy shoots back.

"And wrist check isn't exactly the most friendly either," I say.

"But that really happened Stacy! And you're actually suicidal!" Lydia shoots back.

"They only know she's suicidal because you couldn't keep your lips shut while talking to your new cool friends, and how do I know your nipples are hairless?" Stacy retorts.

"Wait, what THAT'S HOW THE SCHOOL FOUND OUT?! You bitch." I shout back at her.

"Wait! Lils!" Lydia chases after me as I storm out hearing Stacy yelling something about her Rabbi Rebecca impressions behind us.

I turn around to face her, tears streaming down my face, mascara a mess. "How could you." That was all I managed to breathe out before running to the nearest bathroom. I pull out my phone and text my mom that an SOS is happening, aka my feelings are here. As she replies asking me what happened I explain to her exactly how Lydia betrayed me both with my crush and my secrets. I feel there is no other choice but this one. Eventually, after snapping my rubberband on my wrist a couple of times and doing my box breathing I am able to calm myself down. I go out of the stall and look at myself in the mirror, before taking a quick pic, because crying pics are the best pics. I take out my makeup bag from my backpack and redo my eyeliner and mascara before putting on more lipgloss to cover my puffy cheeks.

AUTHORS NOTES: Elkie is my real Hebrew name! It means Ellie and I inherited it from my great grandmother who passed shortly after my birth. I know I'm getting a little deeper with this book but I really like to express myself through my writing and I don't know how else without really being myself within my character.