The One Where Pinkie Knows

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You can't explain Pinkie Pie, and that's just the way it is.

People(and by people I mean Twilight) have tried and failed for years to figure her out. They've done tests, readings, psychological examinations— but they only end up with more questions than when they started.

Like I said before, I stopped questioning Pinkie a lonngg time ago. She said and did random things so often that I started expecting it, and soon enough, enjoying it, too. Yeah, she's weird, and goofy, and she can be kind of creepy, but she's an awesome friend. That's enough to get her the Rainbow Dash seal of approval.

BUT...sometimes, I really want to revoke that seal.

"HOW DID YOU GET IN MY HOUSE?!"

Right now is one of those times.

"This isn't your house, silly!" Pinkie giggles all innocent-like. "It's your apartment!"

I think my blood pressure just spiked, which is crazy, 'cuz I didn't even think I had blood pressure 'til just now. "How did you get into my apartment, then?!"

Pinkie scrunches up her face in concentration, then grins. "Oh, that! Well, you see, I used my top-secret-wanted-by-international-governments-key-to-everything!" She pulls out a paper clip. "But that's besides the point. Dashie, I know what you've been hiding."

"Pinkie, I—" what do I even say, here?! This whole thing is skewed against me. Today's been off already, Pinkie just ambushed me, and I don't even know if the secret she's got on me is the crushing on my best friend one or something completely different.

Argh, even my internal monologue's turning on me now! I don't have a crushing on my best friend secret, cuz I'm not crushing on my best friend! Things are just weird right now, ok?!

Ok, ok, no more panicking. I can still turn this around! No, I will turn this around. I look Pinkie right in the eyes, squaring my shoulders. "Do your worst, Pinkie. I've got nothing to hide."

🌈🌈🌈

Before I know it, Pinkie's turned my living room into an interrogation room. She cuts all the lights apart from the flashlight she shines into my face.

She sits me down on the couch and starts circling me, walking annoyingly slow.

"Think we could speed this up, Pinks? I've got plans, y'know," Acting annoyed feels way better than letting it show that this whole thing's kinda freaking me out.

"Hmmm...Tell me Rainbow Dash, if that is your real name, what did you have for breakfast today?"

Weird start, but calling anything Pinkie says weird is just redundant. "Froot Loops,"

Pinkie nods in complete seriousness. "And for lunch?"

"Nothing, forgot my bag at home. What does this have to do with—"

"I'm asking the questions here!"

I hold my hands up in surrender. "Ok, jeez, I get it,"

"Ahem. Now, Dashie, I noticed you're wearing sweatpants today. Any reason for that?"

I lean back on the couch, shrugging. "Pfft, yeah, I'm wearing them 'cuz they're comfy,"

Pinkie stops pacing and stares at me. "Comfy, huh? Inch-resting..."

"Uhh, how exactly?? It's perfectly normal to want to dress comfortable. S'not like I'm Rarity, or something."

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