BLACKHOUSE [H.S.]

Thirty-Three

"Who's hungry?" Louis snaps me out of my train of thought, and I watch as everyone starts walking inside.

I hesitate for a moment, waiting for the group to go ahead of me so I can catch my breath before we have dinner. Just when I think I have an opportunity to do so, Katie walks slowly up to me, and I have to resist the urge to turn around and walk away from her. Instead, I keep my head forward and begin following everyone inside.

"Hi," she whispers in a meek tone of voice.

All I can do is purse my lips in response.

"What's your deal?" She asks me, sounding a little more confident this time.

"What do you mean?" I say, chewing nervously on the inside of my cheek.

"You know what I mean. You're being weirder than usual."

I can't help but scoff at her observation.

Weird?

"I don't know what you're talking about," I mumble, feeling slightly annoyed by her statement.

I step in front of her to walk inside, and beeline for the fridge so I can get another beer. I crack open the can, and turn away from everyone to quickly down it without them noticing. I can feel the alcohol heating up my skin, my cheeks feeling red-hot as my head starts to feel fuzzy.

Mindlessly, I help everyone move all of the food from the counter, to the center of the table, almost tripping over my feet a few times due to the alcohol now flooding my system. I don't mind it, though. It's better than losing my shit over the girl now sitting across from me. I even tried to take Lucas's seat, but he wouldn't let me.

"Come on, mate," I groaned quietly. "Just switch me."

"No, stop being weird and sit down," he scolded me, leaving me feeling like a child who was just yelled at by their mum.

• • •

I zoned out for the majority of the dinner, both from the several glasses of champagne and my urge to avoid Katie like the plague. I caught myself staring at her absentmindedly a few times, but luckily, I don't think anyone noticed.

I don't know why the hell I'm acting like this, but I can't help it. There's something about the way my feelings for Katie have changed over the last couple of weeks. I went from hating her, to tolerating her, to... whatever the hell this is. All I know is that whenever I'm around her, the world feels a little bit brighter.

And that scares the shit out of me.

I'm standing outside with Louis, Niall, Lucas, and Elijah now that we've finished dinner. We're all in a circle around the fire pit, and for the hundredth time tonight, I've found myself lost in my own thoughts.

I feel someone nudge my arm with their elbow, and I turn to my left to see Louis staring at me with a look of concern on his face. "What?" I ask, furrowing my brows.

"What is going on with you tonight, H?" He wonders, his eyes flicking back and forth between mine. "I know there's something going on. There has been for a while now."

I feel a lump form in the back of my throat.

By "something", does he mean the drug dealing, fucking the shop assistant, or my frustrating change in feelings towards said shop assistant?

"Nothing," is all I can say.

The knot in my stomach grows tighter the longer he stares at me, like someone is holding both ends of the anxious rope and pulling as hard as they can. The loud music Louis has been playing for the last little while has turned into nothing but static in my mind as the anxiety has built. I shake my head, and toss back the remainder of my eleventh drink of the night.