TBWFE━━the best warriors fanfic ever

Chapter Three

A/N: Chapter three, the chapter on RHS that I was writing before I started this book and forgot about it *dance*

Also, I'm sorry for killing Verykit (Whokit) and Importantkit (Careskit). I SWEAR THEY COME BACK *sob sob*

Perfectionpaw had a successful hunt on her first day of training. Nothing much, just a finch, a mouse, a plump, juicy vole, 968,085,503,426,986,000,000,000,000,000 fish, and a twoleg hand. Nom noms.

Hairypotter had been so proud of her that he had fainted again, and she'd had to leave him where he had fainted (which was in the middle of the river, so yay him).

As she headed back to camp, she couldn't help noticing that the fresh-kill pile was very low. She dropped her catch on the pile and immediately saw it grow a couple hundred miles into the air. "Huh!" she purred condescending to no one in particular. "I guess I'm a better hunter that everyone else!"

Iwuvyoukit scampered over and nuzzled her cheek. "Why of course! You are the bestest most awesomest amazingest cat of al time!" He pushed his nose into her face. She could smell his stinky breath. "WiLl YoU mArRy Me?"

Perfectionpaw: Dude. No. *flicks*

Iwuvyoukit: *sobbing bc sob*

Perfectionpaw: AND DON'T COME BACK YOU LITTLE <>this segment has been cut due to inappropriate language<>

Iwuvyoukit: *uncontrollable sobbing bc he is DEFINITELY old enough to marry her anyway*

While Iwuvyoukit had distracted Perfectionpaw with his dramatic love act, Icanflypaw had gotten a wonderful idea, and was climbing up the fresh-kill pile.

Apprenticewarrior, Icanflypaw's sister, nodded approvingly. "ooooh funsies"

Icanflypaw, (who wasn't very bright, obviously) continued to climb, flexing his shoulders in an attempt to grow the wings that everyone but him and his (not very bright) family knew did not exist.

Eh. Better if he gets out of the gene pool anyway.

Icanflypaw turned and gazed suspiciously at her, as if he had the distinct feeling he had just been zinged.

Clawexterminator, another littermate of Icanflypaw's, flamboyantly catapulted onto the pile, determined to beat his brother to the top. I bet he thinks he had wings just like his brother.

Perfectionmom walked up to Perfectionpaw. "You should be proud that you got enough prey to make them do that. Once they realize they can't fly, it'll already be too late and they'll be out of the gene pool at last."

Perfectionpaw B O M B A S T I C S I D E E Y E D her mother. "of course i'm proud of me i'm da bomb"

Her mom smiled. "You are very much da bomb. I love you, my sweet kit."

Perfectionpaw: *extreme angy* IM NOT A KIT ANYMORE WHY YOU SAY THAT DEATH TO YOU *disco balls* DIE FIEND DIE *stabby stabby*

Perfectionmom: *ded*

Perfectionmom: *life*

Perfectionpaw: WHY DOES EVERYONE KEEP DOING THAT RARGH

Perfectionmom: because reasons o-o

Perfectionpaw: death 2 u

Perfectionmom: sorrysorrysorry you aren't a kit please don't disco ball meee

Perfectionpaw: ur on thin ice mister

Perfectionmom: owo

When Perfectionmom finally decided to scurry back to her den in the warriors' den, our hero turned around and saw that Icanflypaw and Clawexterminator were on the top of the prey pile. They were standing precariously on the 86,000,000,000,000,000th chub, which had the honor to be on the top of her pile.