lost love

1

Manal pov ..

Tears streamed down my eyes as I was reminded the love of my life was leaving , not because he did not love me or because I  didn't love him .

But .. a very timid reason that has made us separate from each other . He was my everything since the days we were at school but unfortunately  we live in two different worlds. 

I couldn't  help but tear up again and more , I love you, and I will always will , my love . I saw the last card that he left me with before he left .

He will always be in my heart, I murmured and walked back home slowly with a heartache.  " Is this for real !! Is this how it feels when your loved one leaves you ? "

I feel like my whole world has crumbled down , I don't  know what I have to live for.  This is some kind of sick torture that I have to endure all my life .

I closed my eyes and swallowed the tight lump, which was on my throat,  " I love you even  more  my darling, but how can we be together in this world ?"

You are like an East Pole while I am the west ,  they say the sun can arise in  East and sets beautifully in  the west side ,  our circumstances  are different.  Even if it will shine but it will take turn and each part will be experiencing the thriving of light differently. 

I walked inside our home , my parent's  home and walked in , I greeted my mom and dad and went inside my room ,they noticed that I wasn't  in the mood and I didn't  want to answer any of their questions  .

I don't  know when I am going to see him again , but I am going to try my best to forget  him although it was going to be so hard . I took off my hijab and stripped off my clothes, and went to the bathtub. 

I soaked inside it and made myself comfortable,  I missed his warmth ! I missed his warm hands on my cold body . " I love you, honey, and I will never  stop loving you!" I murmured unknowingly

I closed my eyes, thinking of how i am going to live my life without him . After half an hour of being inside the bathtub, I walked out and rinsed my body. 

A knock returned me to earth , " Who is there ?" I asked . It's me, Ally, your brother!! Dinner is ready. We are both  waiting for you !! I heard him , 

"Okay !! I will be there soon ,"I tell him and went to my closet and took my sweater and some comfortable pants , I put them on but before that I went to the mirror and raised my sweater up and caressed my bumb .

Tears streamed down from my eyes,  " This is the result of our love and the proof of our special moments  together.  " I am never  going to give you up, baby !! I whispered and took my scarf and wrapped it on my face and closed my sweater, securing my tummy, and walked out   .

My mom , dad, and my brothers  are just so good to me , they love me and adore me, but I.. I can't  help but think that I am already a dissapointemnt . We are a respectable Muslim family, and here I am pregnant with a man who has already left the country a while ago ,and I was weeping and a baby on the way .

I am three months pregnant  and I wonder if I would let anyone know , I walked down the stairs  slowly and reached the dining room . Everyone started eating, and my face was blank with no emotions as I couldn't say anything .

I walked on my usual seat  and sat on the table , I said some prayers and soon I was seated and eating each and everything i saw , " I am never picky and everyone knows that but I can feel myself  eating extra ! "

Slow down Manal,  I can hear my mom telling me and both my brothers and my dad chuckling.  " I smiled a little ,  mom you know I love your cooking !! " you cook like a professionall five star chef!!

Ahh !! Manal, you have been saying that like every now and then and everyday ," well because little sis always says the truth beamed Ahmed, my elder brother.  "

My heart skipped a bit out of nowhere and I found myself coughing , " quickly I drank some water and gulped the whole glass down my throat " i am better now I announced to them after they were all concerned a few minutes ago .

We were done eating, I helped mom take the dirty plates, and soon i went to my room , " I took my laptop and completed my final assignment of my college ! " I am going to graduate anytime soon .

I want to be excited but I can't , I know I am one of the toppest students in the college but ...

But I am scared, I was always with him, every step of the way ! He would make me laugh  he would cheer me up,  he would complement me and tell me how beautiful  I look in my hijabi, and I would blush and smile a little on those silly comments  of his.

But now !! He left  , he left me with his baby , " My heart was yearning for him and beating only for him !"

I can't  say that I commuted any sin at the moment  because he left me, and he was still in love with me ," madly in love with me !"

My baby will always ... I mean, always have his name . He did nothing to hurt me, but like I said, we are like two sides of a coin ,  both different   .

We came from a different world, I guess , I went to my bathroom and washed my face and went to my bed and slept . I looked at my phone and saw the sweet texts which we had been sending each other .

" I miss you now !! "
" I wish you were here with me !!"
" I am the one who is lucky to have you "

" Let's  name our  baby Naia , it's  cute and simple just like you ... " He used to text me and tell me that every day. 

I sighed and closed my phone after looking at the last message . Please, Allah, help me and guide me .

If I made a sin by proving my love and his together by carrying this innocent angel , please punish me and forgive my sins ,

Please have mercy on both of us ..Soon I slipped into the darkness. 

Note : Any names and places used are all a set of fiction,I hope you enjoy the story