Six of Crows Oneshots

Hate Me

Kaz Brekker didn't need a reason.

He didn't say sorry.

He didn't beg.

But today he would've been on his knees. He should've been. It would've hurt his bad leg but some part of his mind begged him to get down and plead.

He said the wrong things. His sleep deprived stupor loosening his tongue after a rough heist without the crows. They had all been in Ketterdam for a while now, one of the rare moments where everyone was in the wretched city for a few months, but they didn't go to a heist and Kaz had been left in the open. Roeder had left his backside and Kaz was left with a bullet buried in his back.

When he got back to the Slat to find the Crows in his office, he had glared. He said the wrong things and insulted his crows. He lashed out at the wrong time, because it's all he'd ever known.

He wanted them to hate him. Hate him and say how they'd found a more stable crewmate to replace him. Someone more kind and nice.

He wanted them to lash out for all he's done. To hit him or just do something. He wanted Nina to lash out, he wanted Jesper to stop biting back the comments. He wanted Wylan to spit words like venom, he wanted Matthias to knock him down with all the Fjerdan Might the bright man had.

Most especially, he wanted Inej to stroke his cheek, as she dug Sankt Peytr into his chest.

He wanted the crows to hate him. Hate him and replace him. Be furious. He wanted them to finally see how much a villain he was. A villain. A monster with terrible and long teeth.

He wanted them to treat him like the city had. To break and bruise him.

Maybe it's because Kaz didn't know how else to be treated.

He had always been thrown around. Like a rag doll, a sack of bones and flesh to be passed around. A rabid dog to be fed the last scraps on the plates of men like Pekka Rollins.

Kaz had lived so long this way, he didn't know how else to feel. He didn't know how to be kind. How to apologize. How to be treated with generosity and a kind hand. Brekker was used to biting that kind hand and tearing them apart before the hand hit him.

Which is why he was sitting in the Van Eck living room, tied to a chair. Multiple ropes and handcuffs looping his arms behind him, and all the crows were in front of him. Standing and waiting.

They invited him for dinner after he'd insulted them all, and without thought he'd accepted the offer of a warm meal. Nina used her limited Heartrender abilities and made him pass out. They took the opportunity and tied him to the chair.

Kaz wouldn't escape, he was too tired and the chair was biting into the barely bandaged bullet wound. This amount of handcuffs and ropes was a little extreme, but rightfully so considering Kaz's knack for unlikely escapes.

He glared at them all, but they all stared back with disgustingly pitiful expressions.

"Get it over with." He said gruffly.

The crows just stared at him, almost confused.

"Go on." He said, waiting for their attacks.

Another silence. Nina was the one who spoke first.

"Kaz, what exactly do you think we're gonna do?"

Kaz stared at them, it was his turn to be confused. Suspicion creeped across his skin like needles, pricking his nerves uncomfortably.

Matthias looked at him with a gentle gaze. Like a cool breeze on a sweltering summer day. How did the man always see the truth before everyone else did? Must be some Djel trick or whatever. Stupid Fjerdans and their holy bullshit. "Brekker. We aren't going to hurt you."