Rings of Fate * TaeKook

Losing

His words shocked me again, I had no idea he felt this way. He has always been good for me.

"What do you mean, screw up again?" I asked, trying to understand where this all was coming from.

"A-At my old s-school, I had g-good friends, I just w-wasn't good with words a-and understanding r-relationships with them. I l-left people out, I-I made them f-feel bad, I hurt them in different w-ways and I didn't e-even know I w-was doing it. They told me o-off one day, like I d-deserved and it was the worst I h-had ever felt." He explained through his tears. I continued to listen and wipe them away, letting him know I was there.

"A-After I realized h-how awful I was, I made sure t-to apologize and n-never make anyone feel that way again. I s-stopped trying to make friends with anyone. I-I stopped trying to let people in. Not b-because I didn't trust them, but because I-I didn't trust myself." He said, his voice getting hoarse.

His tears were still pouring down his cheeks, reliving his worst point in life made me want to hug and kiss away all his worries.

He coughed before continuing.

"As t-time passed, I became m-more reserved and people started to j-just throw themselves at me, always getting i-in my space, trying to get in my pants." He said in distaste.

"So, I just got worse. I didn't want to trust people or myself and I still don't. I didn't want to let anyone in, but when I met you, I just wanted to know you. I wanted to l-let you in because I k-knew you were different. Now you're my everything and I-I am so scared that I will lose you because I still don't trust myself." He said.

My heart broke hearing his words.

"On t-top of everything that's been p-piling in my mind, Jimin h-hates me and it's giving me more anxiety because he is s-something that could come between us and it's a-all too much to think a-about." He finished, his breath picking up the more he voiced out his concerns.

'Jimin?' I thought. My mind completely messed up from all this new information.

"Ok, ok, just breathe." I whispered, scooting as close to him as possible. 

My first instinct to calm him down then talk him through just why I don't agree with anything he just said.

I pushed his face up in front of mine to look into his eyes.

"My love, you are perfect. You may not trust yourself, but I trust you. I trust you more than anything. If you did something wrong, I wouldn't leave you. I would talk with you about it and hope you would understand and work to fix it. I know you would do that because you are an amazing person. If you lose me, that means I would also lose you, which I won't ever allow to happen." I explained with a smile to help cheer him up.

He stared up at me with big doe eyes that showed a look a pure love and adoration. More tears fell from his eyes as he gave me a small relieved bunny smile.

"There's my bunny's smile." I said as I pecked his nose.

He pushed his head in my neck.

"Don't stress anymore about this, Koo. You have nothing to be afraid of. We know we make it. So just be happy and enjoy your life with me instead of worrying about losing it, okay?" I said with a small smile.

He nodded his head in my neck, his few tears falling against my skin as he tried to relax in my hold.

"And about Jimin, I'll talk to him. Why do you think he hates you?" I asked quietly.

"He glares at me e-every time I talk, I u-understand I get closed off towards the rest of our friends, b-but I thought I was getting better. I've heard him say things about me, h-how I'm cold and mean and I know I come off that way, but I s-swear I'm trying to get b-better." He answered desperately after a few moments of silence.

I nodded immediately, letting him know that I believe him.

"I know, love. It's okay. He's just not used to this so just give him time to come around. I'll make sure he's better towards you. I promise." I said in reassurance as he took deep breaths in my neck.

He didn't move at all. He was probably exhausted.

"Have you slept well these past few days?" I asked, knowing if he's stressed, he can't sleep easily.

He shook his head.

"Why don't you try to rest, love?" I asked.

He only shrugged.

"Let's get some rest." I said.

We laid down and cuddled on the bed for a while. I pat Jungkook's hair and gently scratched his back under his shirt as he tried to fall asleep. It didn't take long before he dozed off.

I watched him sleep peacefully, thinking about how lucky I was to have such a pure, perfect boyfriend.