𝙰𝙱𝙲'𝚂 𝚂𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚂𝚝𝚢𝚕𝚎

𝙻𝚘𝚗𝚐𝚒𝚗𝚐

"I love you, but I can't be with you anymore"

Those words absolutely shattered Kelly. He had lost the love of his life. When Benny unexpectedly passed away. Kelly found himself struggling with many emotions. Grief, anger, guilt and regret. Finding himself digging into a dark hole. Deeper each day that passed. Putting up Fort Knox walls. Avoidance at all costs. Distracting himself into projects but while doing that, pushing everyone away, including his girlfriend Stella. Stella did everything she could to be there for him. Never wanting to stop fighting for their relationship. As days went by, things only got worse. Kelly pushed himself and others deeper down. Stella started to feel their relationship was turning toxic. It was bringing her back to her past relationship. In very different ways of course. There was no abuse. But it was crumbling and she couldn't just stand by and watch the chips fall. Not with Kelly. She loved him too much to watch it implode.

After the call Stella assisted Kelly under the bus. They had a job to do, they were both professionals. No matter what was happening in their personal lives. Stella did not even hesitate to assist Kelly. He thanked her. "Anytime" Her short response spoke volumes. As he watched her walk away, it broke him knowing how he had pushed her to the brink. He had lost her. A woman that he would never stop loving. He knew he was grieving in many ways. Having a whole new wave of regret which didn't have anything to do with any grief. He had lost the best thing that ever happened to him. He had taken her for granted. Looking back now, remembering all the times she tried to be there for him, consoling m, supporting and all she needed was something, anything in return from where he was unable to give anything back to her. All she received was walls and more walls.

"This is harder than I thought it would be"

Those were his last words to her as he watched her walk away while in the bunk room. Kelly spent the day orbiting Stella. Watching her train Tuesday. Seeing her light up while offering the pup treats in return for tricks. His sunshine. His light. Who now wasn't even his anymore. Casey had been seeing Kelly mesmerized by Stella everywhere she was throughout the firehouse. Casey holding up the bat signal. Dragging his best friend out on the roof for a cigar chat. Casey saw just how regretful he was feeling. No doubt he was still head over heels in love with Stella and probably always would be.

As they sat down on the roof looking over Chicago. It was a breathtaking view. Kelly lost in his thoughts.

"So Severide. How are you doing? How are you REALLY doing?"

"Fine" grumbled Kelly

"You are so far from fine"

"What do you want me to say Case? That in the midst of the storm rolling around in my head that I lost the love of my life. The one person who made me a different man doesn't love me anymore. That I feel like a shell of a man I once was"

"Whoa. Severide. Stop right there. Stella definitely still loves you. I have absolutely no doubt about that. She didn't break up with you because she doesn't love you. You know that Sev. This is not the end of you and Stella. Just a little break. You and Stella Kidd are meant to be for eternity. You will have your girl back. That is one thing I am sure of"

"I don't know Case. I pushed her away. Pushed her to the brink. Why do I always do this? Ruin anything good in my life and she is the BEST thing in my life"

"Take some time. Get your head on straight. Heal from what you're feeling and what you have been going through. I promise Stella will still be there. She loves you so much Sev. Just keep the faith"

"Yeah. You're right. I'm not going to give up. She is my forever and she deserves more than the man I am right now. I know I can be that man for her. She's worth it. We are worth it"

As they finished their cigars. Kelly felt a feeling of hope. Eventually he would have Stella back in his arms. Maybe this break was what they both needed to find their way back to each other.