Project Athena | Reviews

Child of Prophecy (Emmanuel)

Author: 

Reviewer: Denyefa4

Genre: Fantasy

From what I've read, "Child of Prophecy" is about Analia, a young woman whose fate has already been decided by a seer and written down. However, after discovering a necklace left to her by her late grandmother, Analia learns that it is a relic of the gods that can help her defy her predetermined fate. She decides to enter a dangerous competition, hoping to win the prize and bring back her deceased family.

I found your book intriguing from the very first chapter, as I am a big fan of fantasy. I appreciate that your grammar is clear and understandable, and your use of similes is refreshing. Your opening line immediately caught my attention and drew me in.

Regarding your blurb, I noticed that some words were missing, which made it difficult to understand what the book is about. Instead of starting with Analia's desire to escape fate, try to explain what fate means in the context of your book and what her fate is. Additionally, your blurb lacks a clear stake and goal of the story.

The quote you added to the first part of your book, "Child of Prophecy," was difficult to read due to the font used. In the first chapter, you provided a lot of historical information, which felt like an information dump. While it was interesting, it might be better to ease this information in through dialogue or as the book progresses, rather than including it all at once. Also, you mentioned Analia's grandmother's death twice in the first paragraph after the history, which was unnecessary.

In chapter 2, I was confused when I read that Analia is an orphan. It might be helpful to clarify when she became an orphan earlier in the book. Additionally, in chapter 5, you repeated Analia's dislike for being called a little girl, which you had already mentioned in chapter 4. Consider rephrasing that part to avoid repetition.

Regarding grammar, consider adding a full stop in the sentence "prophesied child of doom-Iyana-creating a bond." Additionally, you frequently switch between past and present tenses, which can disrupt the flow of your book. Consider maintaining consistency in your tense usage. Furthermore, using italics when writing from a character's point of view can help to indicate their inner thoughts.

In chapters 3 and 4, you wrote effectively and appropriately. Good job! However, in chapter 5, you used the word 'manning' repeatedly. Consider looking up a synonym to replace it.

Overall, I think your book is great, and I appreciate the refreshing and unique perspective it offers in the fantasy genre. I would give it a rating of 3 out of 5. If you're a fantasy lover, I am sure that you would enjoy reading this book as it offers a fresh take on the gods, demigods, and humans trope.