mess it up! // theo nott

ii. defense against theodore nott

"Get some sleep, Daph."

Daphne slams her locker shut. She pays no mind to Theo, ignoring him like she always does. It doesn't matter anymore — what he thinks, what he says. It doesn't matter, the way he worries about her, the way he's looking at her right now. Because after a week, Theo's found someone else. Someone who Daphne knew always hated her.

She knows she shouldn't be mad. She has no right to — she was the one who broke it off, who told Theo they weren't worth fighting for, that the spark has died. Daphne cringes as she remembers that night. The lies that she told him. When in all honesty, all she wanted was to hold him, forever and ever. But she didn't tell him that. She never told him that. And now that he's with someone else, she can never tell him that.

Theo steps closer. He touches her shoulder — her breath hitches. Daphne doesn't need the reminder — how warm he feels on her, how good, how right it feels. She yanks his hand away, her eyes glaring at him. Daphne finally sees him again — this close, this real. He's not in her nightmares anymore, not on the other side of the Great Hall. He's in front of her. His pleading brown eyes look so, so beautiful, she hates it.

"I heard about what happened in transfiguration," he says, his hand now in the pocket of his trousers. Daphne watches his lips, how they move as he talks, and she shoves away the memories. How those lips used to kiss hers.

"I know where you were last night. The Hufflepuff party, right? This is not good for you, Daph," he continues. Theo takes one step closer to her again. Daphne backs away, her arm hitting her locker. She can't understand why he's still here, why he's saying all of this. To scold her? To mock her? Why does he pretend to care?

She doesn't want his pity, she doesn't want his sympathy. She doesn't want him to humiliate her like this. How amazing it must feel for him — being with another girl knowing that she's suffering. Daphne shakes her head, clicking her tongue.

"You've got a girlfriend to worry about," she hisses. "I am none of your business." Daphne takes her bag, and stomps away. She fights the urge to look back, to see if her words had hurt him, or the opposite. She wonders if he's chasing after her, demanding her for answers like he used to do. But she quicken her steps, reminding herself that this, talking to Theo again, is not a good thing.

She enters Defense Against The Dark Arts. She's always hated this class since the start of term, because she doesn't have it with any of her friends. Not Harry, not Ron, not even Hermione. She finds a vacant seat and slumps down. Defense Against The Dark Arts is fun to learn, but the fact that she doesn't have friends in the class, and the teacher is Snape, makes it agonizing to go through.

She mentally curses when she sees him walking into class. Daphne forgot that this was the one class she has with Theo. He clutches his books in his hand. Daphne notices he isn't only carrying textbooks, but novels that they used to read together. She closes her eyes, clicking her pen. She knows that the only empty seat is beside her, and that Theo's going to sit there.

He makes his way to her and takes a seat. Daphne doesn't expect him to make conversation, but he does. "Have you been alright?" he asks, she hears him gulp after the words come out of his mouth. "I mean, words got around that you've been having problems."

Daphne clicks her tongue. When they were together, Theo's always been one who never ever cared about what the people of Hogwarts were saying about her. But now he's getting news about her from them — how wonderful.

"I'm just fine," she says. Daphne opens her notes, and promises herself that she wouldn't get distracted in this class.

"I never see you around the library anymore," Theo continues, maybe he didn't get the hint, he was always so persistent.

"Yes, I don't go there as often anymore," Daphne hisses. She hopes that Theo would sense her tone and not talk to her anymore.

They used to spend so much of their time in the library together. They'd find a hidden corner, behind all of those bookshelves, and they'd read romance novels together, while Theo occasionally smuggling drinks in.

"You're the best thing that's ever been mine, you know that?" He once said in one of those library rendezvous. Daphne remembers still. She remembers how he said it, how it made her feel. She wishes she could go back to before it all went wrong, before she went off the rails, but it's better this way for them, for him.

"Oh," Theo says. "I still go there all the time. Where do you hang out these days then?"

The bell seems to save her. Snape walks in the class in his black robe, and Daphne shifts in her seat. "Snape doesn't like students chatting in the middle of class," Daphne warns Theo, and he stays silent.

She doesn't hear a word Snape says when he starts his lesson. She doesn't know if it's the alcohol, or the drug that she can't seem to get enough of sitting beside her.

Theo smells like he always does, like a cafè. The scent of his unreasonably expensive cologne gets drowned out by it. He always smells like fresh baked chocolate chip cookies, espresso, and coffee buns. His favorites. Daphne loves the way he smells, and she had always told him that when they were together. She sneaks a glance and sees him twirling a strand of his hair in his finger, scribbling his notes. She's always been so fascinated by the look on his eyes when he's focused.

Daphne shakes her head. She can't be doing this anymore. She can't be thinking about him like this.

She flinches when she feels his warm skin on hers. His fingers tap hers rapidly, trying to get her attention. Daphne scooches away, but Theo follows.

"Hey, what do you think about amortentia?" he asks. "It's for my notes. Do you think amortentia is a form of dark magic?"

Daphne shrugs. Snape wasn't talking about amortentia at all. This is DADA, not potions. Daphne looks up to see that he has written about the revulsion jinx. Not one thing about amortentia.

She doesn't look at Theo when she points at the chalkboard. He only nods. "I know, Daph. I just think you might've smuggled amortentia to my drink or something at one point."

She turns her head to him, shooting him a look that could kill. Now he's really getting to her. She never once forced herself on him, let alone gave him a stupid love potion.

"You fucking douchebag," she mumbled, but clear enough that he could hear her. Theo only smirks, like he intended to get under her skin like this.

He chuckles. "I'm just playing with you, Daph."

He continues to giggle as she claws her hair in frustration, and Snape takes notice of this.

"Mr. Nott, Miss Lupin-Black," he calls. "Is there something you'd like to share with the class?"

Theo, that stupid grin still on his face, says, "No, Professor." But Daphne shakes her head. She raises her hand and says, "Actually, yes. This boy has been harassing me and it's really bothering my focus, Professor. Could I please switch seats?"

Snape is annoyed, as he always is with the girl who has the last name Lupin-Black, but he grants her wish and she switches with Pansy.