𝗡𝗶𝗸𝗸𝗶 𝗦𝗶𝘅𝘅 ~ 𝗢𝗻𝗲-𝗦𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝗖𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 🤍

• 𝗜𝗻𝘃𝗮𝗹𝗶𝗱 𝗔𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 🩷

•❤️•

Y/N's POV, 1991

Dating your best friend is always a risky game to play but when feelings get involved it's hard to see it like that and you just go with whatever your heart wants damming the consequences that could potentially arise.

That's what went down with me and Nikki, we were friends for years before we got together, then in 1986, we became a couple and we were together from 1986 until early last year, as Nikki had left me because he'd met someone else, they'd been friends for a while yet he'd wanted to take that further with her, so broke up with me though wanted us to remain friends.

The situation ruined my self esteem at first, I felt inferior to the wives of the other guys although they were all my friends, but I particularly felt lesser than Sharise and Heather, given they were just stunning and when Nikki left me all the opinions I had of myself crashed through the floor.

Both of them told me otherwise, and they tried their hardest to make me feel better but I couldn't, I've hardly been able to look Nikki in the eyes since, especially when I've had to be around him and his new girlfriend, the woman he left me for.

It was tough and still to this day it was tough, even when I heard that he'd ended that relationship a few weeks ago, it gave me no satisfaction at all because it changed nothing. I still loved him and if he ever asked me to go back to him I would in a heartbeat but it doesn't change what he did and I couldn't go through what he put me through again.

I'm just starting to get my self confidence back and I wasn't going to let him ruin it again.

Realistically, I should just call it quits with Nikki all together, I know, but to do that I'd have to see less of the other guys when they're all my friends too, and never talking to Nikki again would leave a hole in my life bigger than the hole he left in my heart and that hurt enough.

I just wished my feelings for him would go away, I doubt that'd happen anytime soon, as he seemed to get better and better looking each day, which was really bad news for me.

And I had to face Nikki tonight, it was Tommy's birthday and all the guys were headed to his place, a long with many others. I'd been invited, I think that goes without saying but Nikki had offered to give me a lift given me and the other guys had the option to crash out at Tom's place and not leave until tomorrow morning and I think we were all cashing that offer in.

I had been tempted to decline the offer Nikki had given, but then decided to just let him as it saves me a little gas. I was regretting the choice a tad now because I'd just only realised that getting into an car with Nikki meant we'd have to talk, and we'd had few one on one conversations since we broke up, there's usually been at least one other person there to stop things from being awkward as hell.

Tonight for this party, I was dressed to impress, subconsciously doing it to impress Nikki but not outwardly admitting it because I was aware it sounded so incredibly pathetic.

It was approaching the time where Nikki was meant to pick me up, and I'd been perfecting my make up for the last twenty minutes, making sure the dress I was wearing was as perfect on my form as I could get it, trying not to be overly critical of myself.

I'd always been that way but Nikki, up until we spilt, had always been able to make me stop feeling insecure, even when we were just friends. Everything and nothing changed when we broke up, we tried and tried to go back to how things used to be, maybe things had for Nikki but me? No. Things were so so far from how they were and I now resented myself for allowing our friendship to be tainted, a thing I always knew would happen if I agreed to date Nik yet did it anyway so it's my own fault.