Favorite RWBY Characters

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"Medic, ya bleeding idiot!! Everyone knows that the best RWBY character is Nora Valkyrie!" Demoman shouted.

Medic crossed his arms and scoffed. "Nein, you drunken dummkopf! It's clear drinking all of zat alcohol made you lose your sense of taste! Ze best character is obviously Jaune Arc!"

"WHAT THE BLOODY FUCK, MEDIC?!" Demoman roared, his tone going up an octave at the German's claim. "How can ye like a character who's so freakin' incompetent at everything?!"

"Woah, woah, guys!" Scout enters the room, putting his hands between them before they could start a fight. "I could hear you guys arguing from my room! What are you guys doing arguing at 1 in the morning?!"

Scout's intervention causes both Demoman and Medic to pause their argument, momentarily startled by his sudden appearance. They shook it off, though, their gazes unwavering as they glared at each other.

"We were just havin' a wee discussion about our favorite RWBY characters, lad." Demoman says, glancing at Scout. "I said my favorite character was Nora Valkyrie, and then Medic had to get all funny and say Jaune Arc was the best!"

"Zat is because he is ze best, you vone-eyed schweinhund!" Medic proclaims heatedly, "Jaune Arc is a great character because of his tactical brilliance und his semblance, Aura Amp, allows him to enhance other people's auras und semblances, including their healing effects!"

"Even if that's true, Jaune is a complete waste of space in the series!" Demoman barked, "He's bloody incompetent and shit at fightin', and yet he decided to leave his home and go to Beacon without any experience whatsoever for a stupid dream!"

"Like your character is any better!" Medic argues, scowling. "Nora Valkyrie is just a sugar-crazed meth-addict who swings zat hammer around like a mindless primate! She's reckless und hyperactive, und zat gets her into situations zat could potentially kill her! Honestly, I don't understand how Lie Ren even tolerates her."

"At least she knew how to fight, unlike yer anime protagonist syndrome inflicted bitch boy!" Demoman argues back, his expression smug. Medic looked ready to throttle him, but he didn't get the chance.

"Honestly, those two characters suck donkey nuts!" Scout cuts in, causing Demoman and Medic to stare at him with shock.

"What the fuck did ye just say, laddie?" Demoman barked at Scout's words.

"Vhat gives you any right to question our taste, you failed abortion?!" Medic says, narrowing his eyes.

Scout smirks. "Look, guys, I've seen a bit of RWBY, and Nora is kinda boring for the first three volumes and Jaune will always continue to suck ass." Scout says, "I think we're missing the real star of the show, and that's Yang Xiao Long!"

"WHAT THE FUCK, SCOUT?!?" Medic and Demoman shout at the Bostonian. Their voices echo in the room, filled with disbelief and anger.

"Ye daft emasculated preteen! How can ye say that Yang Xiao Long is the best character?" Demoman shouts, pointing an accusatory finger at Scout.

"Scout, you've clearly lost vhatever consists of your mind." Medic says, shaking his head. "Yang is just an even more reckless brute zan Nora! Besides, you only like Yang because she's a total bombshell!"

"That's true," Scout says, not ashamed to admit that even as he stands his ground and is verbally assaulted on both ends. "Yang is totally sexy as hell, and she knows how to rock that sweet hot body of hers even as she kicks ass like a beast!"

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⏰ Last updated: Jul 12, 2023 ⏰

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