A kkoma a day, keeps the sadness away

Chapter Two: An Opportunity

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The sky is clear, there are multiple stars shining in the sky but the star right next to Yoo Joonghyuk is the most beautiful star, the brightest and most eye-catching star ever. They are both lying on the grass in their lawn, the kids wanted a larger space to have picnics on so a lawn was made on their request, the men sit in comfortable silence, there is usual sound of crickets and cool wind blowing around, it's good that both of them are wearing hoodies right now since it's chilly, not that they needed to wear hoodies since they have the ice resistance skill. Kim Dokja is lying down, legs spread on the grass, hands intertwined with Yoo Joonghyuk who is also lying down on the grass, smelling the fresh scent of leaves. He was reluctant to lie down but it's not so bad, he muses. The companions are staring at the night sky, at the stars to be precise. The stars blink once in a while as if greeting the men.
 
"I looked for you in the sky so many times when you weren't here. I looked for a specific star, I longed for it to finally shine so I can know my reader is back." Yoo Joonghyuk breaks the silence, his voice is raspy and has a hint of yearning.
 
"It was hard, you did well." Kim Dokja says because he doesn't know what else to say.
 
Yoo Joonghyuk stays silent, Kim Dokja turns to look at the man, assuming he probably fell asleep when all of a sudden he is pulled into a tight hug, Yoo Joonghyuk buries his face in the crook of the reader's neck who is puzzled at the sudden hug.
 
"Yoo Joonghyuk?" He asks, he doesn't get any reply. He taps his protagonist's shoulder, "Joonghyuk?" The man doesn't reply, hugging his reader even more tightly. "Just... let's stay like this for a while." He says after a while.
 
Kim Dokja wants to ask what is wrong but for now he stays silent and quietly strokes his protagonist's pitch black hair.
 
"I am right here." He says instead, he feels Joonghyuk's breath hitch, "Yeah, you are here. You are right here by my side." He whispers back.
 
This happens often, Kim Dokja is still not used to this vulnerable side of Yoo Joonghyuk but it's only Joonghyuk whose each side no matter bad or good will Dokja accept wholeheartedly because it's not just anyone but Yoo Joonghyuk.
 
"I am sorry." The protagonist mumbles.
 
"For what?" No really, for what? Kim Dokja doesn't know.
 
"A lot." Yoo Joonghyuk replies quietly. Kim Dokja hums quizzically, allowing him to continue but Yoo Joonghyuk stays silent. Kim Dokja silently activates 'Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint' skill.

'...For not recognizing you when I finally met you after 1863 regressions, for not trusting myself to you sooner, for letting you die again and again, for killing you, for abandoning you in the subway and... and for letting the half of you feel rejected when his purpose was my, the companions happiness.'
 
Kim Dokja goes silent, it's still hard when 49 is the topic, it's a touchy topic for him. He coughs awkwardly, pretending as if he didn't just read the other's thoughts.
 
"It's okay, it's all in the past now." He says instead, because if they get in the depth of the past there are so many things both of them are guilty for.
 
"Kim Dokja don't leave me again." Yoo Joonghyuk says, he sounds out of breath, Kim Dokja frowns in concern. 
 
"I won't go back to the subway." Kim Dokja replies earnestly. He has finally accepted that he deserves love, he deserves to be selfish too so call him selfish but he won't go anywhere again.
 
Kim Dokja raises Yoo Joonghyuk's head and kisses his forehead, again and again. Yoo Joonghyuk suddenly moves a bit, now the reader lays on the grass under him. Yoo Joonghyuk stares him in the eyes, the shine in Dokja's eye is equivalent to a star's, so mesmerizing that Yoo Joonghyuk thinks he can get lost in them, his gaze moves down to his sponsor's lips, which are slightly swollen because of their makeout session yesterday, Yoo Joonghyuk bends down to kiss his reader on the lips, softly planting a chaste kiss, his constellation who looks so, so beautiful in the moonlight stares at him with endearment. They shift a bit and now Yoo Joonghyuk lays on the grass with Yoo Joonghyuk's arm under Kim Dokja's head, the reader is using it as a pillow while he wraps himself in the taller male's embrace, listening to his thumping heartbeat as he snuggles closer to the broad chest. They stay like that, holding each other, hugging each other until the sun rises in a comfortable silence.