His obsession

Untitled Part 9

A month after the trip in the woods...

I grabbed Damien's sweatshirt and cuddled it tightly as I slept. I kept thinking about Damien....I just wish he could hold him in my arms while I kiss his shoulders and neck.....I wish....I could hold him without getting short flashbacks...I want to touch him so badly. I know I'm a disaster...I know it's hard for him to love me. WHY DOES HE LOVE ME?! I'M DESPICABLE! I grabbed a bottle of whisky as I texted Damien, "I love you," and "Don't blame yourself" (3:00 AM). I pulled on a black fishnet shirt and some ripped jeans. I would take a swing of my whisky every few seconds as I pulled the clothes on. I heard my window open as I tried to open my safe to get out my knife. Damien snatched the bottle of whisky out of my hands. He said, "I gave your parents the expired pills and the bloody knives after the last time you went to the mental hospital... I felt tears drip down my cheeks as I realized...I'm hurting him by doing shit like this...he looks so scared and worried....I muttered, "I'm sorry...I don't wanna hurt you." He whispered, "I know...You're just in pain."

Damien held me in his arms as he kept whispering, "You're ok...I got you.....You're not a burden." Usually, I hate it when people say stuff like that but Damien is the exception for most things....I started to push myself into him as I dreamt about him biting me on my neck. I started to moan.....I suddenly heard, "Shit....I-I.....stop ... .uhhh." I quickly pulled away from Damien....I looked down to see a big wet spot on his pants. I stated, "You can use my clothes." He quickly got up and grabbed my pj's out of my dresser. He started to change in front of me as I stared. He pulled on a pair of my underwear....I blushed as I looked away. Damien noticed...he was about to climb into my bed with only boxers on....he quickly halted as he sat next to me....he whispered, "Damn....you do stuff to me that I can't even explain....you could probably get me to kill someone by just asking." He got up and pulled on the pj's. He laid down next to me as he asked, "Is it ok if I cuddle you or do you want to be the big spoon?" I whispered tiredly, "I want to be the big spoon." I turned around slowly as I wrapped my arms around him.

I woke up to Damien grabbing at my chest as he whimpered in his sleep. I grabbed his hands. I started to whisper, "It's ok. You're just having a nightmare." I held his hands as I tried to comfort him. Damien whispered (while rolling over to face me), "I'm sorry-" I cut him off as I kissed his lips gently. Damien blushed red as he stared at me...he looked as if he was waiting for me to kiss him again. I leaned in slowly....he looked as if he was being tortured to wait ten more seconds for me to kiss him. I slowly slid my tongue into his mouth. Damien pulled away as he whispered, "Is it ok if I lose a little bit of my self-control and put my hand in your pants?" I turned red as I nodded, I was flabbergasted. I don't know why but his asking for permission made me feel safe around him. He slid his hand near my crotch as we started to kiss again....I started to panic so I pushed his hand away...I whispered, "That..kinda triggered me....but sitting on your lap usually doesn't...." He nodded as he asked, "Do you want to sit on my lap?" I nodded as I sat on his lap. I stared at him until he snapped out of his daze and began to kiss me......

Damien and I went downstairs to cook breakfast together. When we entered the kitchen Damien and I saw a cat with a ribbon on it....It turned out that my parents left a note saying, "Sorry for missing your birthday yesterday. I hope this helps make it up to you." I coughed at the fact that they think getting me a pet makes up for their absence. It's kinda funny though I forgot yesterday was my birthday ...Oh wait that's probably why I expected to see my parents when I woke up..... "haha" I'm an idiot for believing they wouldn't miss it. At least they got me a cat and not a dog or something. The cat seems calm, playful and seems to love attention. I want to name the kitten Ash because it's mostly black with dark gray speckles on him. Damien and I love how he looks. Damien wants to call the cat "Franky, "Smores," and or "Ace.'' I shook my head and stated, "Doesn't his fur look ashy? So what if I call him Ash." Damien nodded in agreement. Damien helped me get all the cat stuff situated in my room.