The Violinist GxG (intersex)

Chapter 2

Vivienne

I was sent home the next morning, the doctor gave me some painkillers and told me to not get the cast wet. I did not care about the cast, I did not care about anything at all. I was in a daze still in disbelief, I have nothing left. I lost the last hope, I lost everything. 

I sat on my dark green couch staring at my violin, it only had a few scratches on the outside, nothing wood polish wouldn't fix. I was more worried about the violin than I was worried about myself, it was everything I had and everything I ever wanted. "Honoré Derazey, Paris circa 1860" as my grandma used to tell me, it was an antique piece that she owned. She told me a woman gave it to her great-great-grandma many years ago, then her great-grandma got a hold of it until it reached her and lastly me.

For those who see it, they assume it was just an old instrument without meaning, yes it looked old and beat up but it was everything I've ever wanted, it was something that'll never lose or get rid of. It meant everything to me. 

"What am I supposed to do now?"

I was able to hear my ringtone go off since I had my hearing aids on, I answered the phone seeing that the director was calling me. I realized today was practice day and I didn't inform him about my accident and didn't even show up to the theater.

"Vivienne? Where the hell are you?" Mr. Coleman said with a serious tone, he was an old man who I respected very much but sometimes he gets on my nerves, he can be very annoying.

"I don't think I can make it Mr. Coleman, I've had a terrible accident and I broke my hand" I stared at my right hand with pity, pity for myself. I heard him gasp loudly from the other side of the phone, I sighed knowing where he was going with this, He was going to call me reckless and irresponsible.

"How can you be so reckless Vivienne, you know we have an event in two months. An event where you're supposed to be solo playing" That I didn't know, he never confirmed it to me he only said I "might" play but never said it was for sure. I can't believe this is happening to me, when I break my wrist and won't ever be able to play again I get the only chance to be the concertmaster.

"At least show up for practice today, I need you to check the main composition for any mistakes." 

"It doesn't need to be checked, I wrote the damn thing." I hang up the phone and stood up to put my violin back in its protective case, what bothers me is that if you see my house, my room especially, you'd be so surprised by the number of crumpled music sheets thrown on the ground, just for my compositions to not be recognized as my own.

I'm not saying they're using me to get famous, they just add my name as "co-composer" next to our conductor. Okay fine...maybe they are using me, but I needed the job, I needed the money to pay rent and to live. I had no other option.

The theater was only five minutes away from my apartment so I didn't bother to dress up, I stayed in my sweats and loose shirt. I made my way inside the place hearing the faint sound of melodies, the closer I got the more clear it got.