~Saylah~

Chapter 7

Y/n's POV

I had spent the last 2 months getting everything ready. I had an official name for the baby that I refused to tell anyone, even though they begged me everyday.

John B and I had officially switched rooms, and everything was set up the way I wanted. The house was filled with different baby supply's. The kitchen was stocked with bottles, formula, baby food, a small set of cutlery for when she got older, and a bottle rack with a bottle cleaner next to the sponge on the sink.

The cabinets, pantry, fridge, and other doors in the house, had all been baby proofed, some devices simpler than others.

There was a swing in the living room, as well as a baby bathtub that we were storing under the sink until she got here. There was baby shampoo and conditioner as well as body wash. There was smaller and softer wash cloths and brushes in case she came with a head of hair.

Everything had changed drastically since the baby shower, and even more since I found out I was pregnant.

I still had mixed emotions about the baby, which is what I still called her in order to hide the name. But since I have everything set up and my bags for the hospital are already packed I feel more ready than I have at all in these past few months.

I know who my doctor is and which nurses will be helping deliver her. I already have a pediatrician picked out and Kiara took it upon herself to write down any and all emergency related phone numbers and stuck them of the fridge, so we're safe on that front.

At this point we were just waiting for baby girl to get here. Everyone had seemed to be so excited which made me feel more confident about everything. And everyone was very supportive which was always appreciated.

All in all, things were calm. Everything seemed put together and I had been treading lightly.

My luck had always ran short and I just knew if I wasn't careful something bad would happen.

"Are you really not gonna tell us her name?" JJ asked me.

"No I'm not. It's not even gonna be that big of a deal to you guys." I told them as Kie sipped her beer loudly. She was hammered.

"It is a big deal. Your naming her after me of course." Kie said and I just laughed.

"Sure honey." I patted her head and she smushed her face into my arm, resting there.

"Why won't it be a big deal?" John B asked.

"Just because it's not really special. I just like it." That was total bullshit.

It was special to me. But I didn't want to tell them that because I already felt guilty for still holding onto the past.

But I wanted to be able to at least give her something when she asked questioned about her dad. And I felt like telling her how she got her name would be perfect.

Maybe it won't then but now, I was still to hurt to think about the good times we've had, which is why I wasn't sure how much I'd tell her about him.

But only time would tell.

"That just give you more reason to tell us." JJ huffed leaning on my other arm. I wish I could drink.

"Well considering these two are drooling on me and your half asleep, you won't even remember anyways." I said to John B who was nodding off in front of me.

"Hey, this is just practice man." Kie said licking my arm and I pushed her forehead wiping my arm off.

"That's gross, why'd you do that?" I said.