Blood Gulch, Red Base
Simmons and Grif are on top of Red Base. A soldier in red known as Private Franklin Delano Donut, is walking up the ramp behind the duo.
Simmons: Hey, that's not exactly what happened.
Grif: Yes, it is. You said, "I'm not going to the Vegas quadrant," and then the next thing I know you're in an escape pod headed for-
???: Excuse me, uh... sirs.
Grif: Sirs? (turns to Donut) Aw, crap.
???: I was told to report to Blood Gulch Outpost Number One and speak to whoever's in charge.
Grif: Sorry man, Sarge is at Command getting orders. Ain't nobody in charge today.
Simmons: Actually Sarge left Y/n in charge while he went to Command, but Y/n had gotten orders from Command to explore the surrounding area due to them detecting a strange reading, so he left me in charge and told me that if you start causing trouble I should do what Sarge said and (clears throat and attempts to imitate Sarge) "Git in the Warthog and crush yer head like a tomato can!"
Grif: That was the worst impression I ever heard, and you are such a kiss-ass.
Simmons: Rude, okay rookie, what's your story?
Donut: Private Dount reporting for duty, sir. I'm ready to fight some aliens.
Simmons:(snickers) Private "Donut"?
Grif: A couple of things here rookie, first off Private Donut? I think somebody needs a new nickname, secondly, what's with the armor color?
Donut: This IS the standard issue red.
Grif: Yeah, I know. Listen, only two kinds of people wear standard-issue armor; officers and recruits, and since you're not threatening to gut me like a fish, you're probably not an officer.
Donut:(pointing at Simmons) Well, he's wearing red armor too.
Simmons: No, I'm wearing Maroon armor.
Donut: Isn't it the same thing?
Simmons: No, Maroon is a dark red, yours is just red.
Donut: Well, how do I get a different color armor?
Simmons: I bet the Blues don't have to deal with this kind of crap.
--Blood Gulch, Blue Base--
At Blue Base, we see Church, Tucker, and a new soldier in standard blue armor looking at a tank.
Caboose: So I say to the guy, "How are you gonna get the tank down to the planet?" And he goes, "I'll just put it on the ship," and I go, "If you've got a ship that can carry a tank, why not just put guns on the ship and use it instead?"
Tucker: Hey, kid.
Caboose: Yeah?
Tucker: You're ruining the moment, shut up.
Caboose: Oh, okay. You got it, man!
Church: You know what? I could blow up the whole damn world with this thing.
--Cut back to Red Base--
Simmons: Okay, Private Donut, here's the deal.
Grif: I just refuse to call him Private Donut!
Simmons: Anyway, we've got a very important mission for you. You, think you can handle it?
YOU ARE READING
Project Unity (Red vs Blue reader insert)
ActionEver since the Director of Project Freelancer split up the Alpha, the Chairman of the UNSC decided that someone should keep an eye on him and sent Y/n L/n into his program to do it, but things didn't go as planned and he went MIA shortly after, atle...
