𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘚𝘦𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘋𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 | 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘰 𝘙𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘭𝘦

𝔉𝔩𝔦𝔯𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔥 𝔇𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥

Since I didn't let myself be seen for a few hours, Draco and Astoria were very worried because they didn't know that I was already back at the manor. Only when they literally blew up my door and saw me they could breathe properly again. They jumped towards me and took me in their arms. „For God's sake of Raven, what happened??" Astoria asked me worried. „I swear if Yaxley did something I'll make him pa-„ but before he could continue talking I interrupted him. „Everything is fine. He didn't do anything," I said and gave them a weak smile. But what happened then?" Astoria asked me, who was completely agitated. I could be so grateful to have Draco and Astoria. They were only two years older than me, but they acted like my parents. Not that I would be angry about it. It was the complete opposite. I was glad to have them.

„Keres was with me at the Great Lake," I said and looked at the ground. The two immediately knew what was going on and took me in their arms. „But why exactly there? He knew about your story at Hogwarts," Draco said in a pissed tone. „Not at all. My father ordered him to go there with me". „But I don't understand that either," Astioria said questionably. "My father never liked that I mourned Hogwarts afterwards, because I belonged to the dark side and should be happy about it. That's why he thought that if he sent me there with Keres, Keres could get me to see it that way. However, his plan didn't quite work out," I said and wiped a tear from my cheek. „Oh Raven" Astoria said and looked me in the eyes.

„How about we go down to the kitchen, bake some and distract ourselves," she said. „Nothing better than that," I answered. „Come on, what are we waiting for, let's go," Draco said, took me and Astoria by the hand and literally dragged us into the kitchen. I couldn't put into words how grateful I was for both of them.

M A T T H E O

I was outside and didn't try to stab myself. I was already tired of playing the lord of all the dumb people here. I had no idea how my father could stand it for such a long time. The only solution to calm my nerves now was the same as always. Kill. I apparated down to Azkaban and killed the little innocent souls who have been staying there for a while now and were just waiting for their death. But even after my hundredth sacrifice, I did not feel the satisfaction that I otherwise always felt. No. I had another desire. And it wasn't killing. It was talking.

Since my conversation with Amirez, my life has changed strangely without that i wanted it to. I felt things that I've never felt before. A desire for closeness and something whose name I will never pronounce, as I would never feel it. It killed my nerves and couldn't cope with it. I was an emotionally-cold person, and will remain so as long as my breath still made its thing here. Nevertheless, I had to do something against this unknown sting in my stomach, which intensified from time to time, as long as I thought of her. I decided to aparate back to the manor and distract myself a bit there while I was still in control.

R A V E N

When we finished baking, I went to the bathroom and took a warm shower. The purest chaos happened in the kitchen, and I was full of flour and dough. However, that didn't bother me, because I had rarely laughed as much as I did today. However, when I got into the shower and shut the hot water on, I quickly regretted it. The wounds on my back burned my soul away and I couldn't do anything about it. Every time I took a shower, I had to remember all the bad moments in my life. Its hard to forget your past when its all written over your body.

After drying my hair and putting on something again, I went out of the bathroom and thought about what I could do now. It was just before seven, which was definitely too early for me to go to sleep. So I decided to go to the garden of the manor again, where I met Riddle last night. This scenario had actually been removed a bit from my brain, but had still eaten up firmly in there. Without worrying too much, I walked out of the manor and quietly stepped behind the garden to my favourite place.

But again, I wasn't there alone. Because who would have thought it. The only true Mattheo Marvolo Riddle was once again in the same place as me at the same time. I thought about turning around again, but I decided against it and walked to him. I knew it wasn't exactly the smartest idea, but I didn't care much about it. I stood next to him in front of the railing like last night. „Hi" I said so as not to do it akward. „Hey," he said and looked at me. „Already back from your meeting with Keres?," he asked me curiously. „Yup" I said, because I definitely didn't want to tell him the whole story. „Was it so bad?" „Someone is curious," I said with a grin. „Not really. I just don't have anything better to do," he said and turned his gaze away from me again. I didn't know what to say, I knew I would start crying again, if i would tell him that we were near Hogwarts. And who wants to cry in front of the dark lords son.

„You were at the Great Lake, am i right," he said and I looked at him pissed off. „Riddle stop creeping around in my thoughts" I literally hissed at him. „Im not, no need to worry. Keres had mentioned it at a Death Eater meeting," he said. „Oh," I answered bluntly. „I know how you feel, Amirez," Riddle said and looked down. „What?" I asked again because I thought I was mocking myself. „You've already understood me, just shut up," he said and turned his gaze away from my field of vision. "I know that you have always seen Hogwarts as a home. Just like everyone else who lived in Hogwarts. I was also a student there. I also spent half my life there. I never had a home until I came to this school," he confessed to me and looked at me.

„Do you trust me Amirez?" He asked me and offered me his hand. Trusting him was definitely a bad idea. But I like bad ideas.

I took his hand and before I realised it, I was trapped in a strange spell. Memories of Hogwarts were buzzing through my whole head. But this time no bad ones, but only all good ones. The beautiful memories we made before the war. Exactly these. It was like I was going through every Hogwarts year again. But it came to a certain end. The end I was afraid of. The war. But before it could play in my head, the memories stopped, and I felt myself on solid ground again. It wasn't until I opened my eyes that I realised where I was.

I was standing in the ashes of who i used to be