SOLITUDE TO SOLACE

3.

Start with it

~~~~~~~
The idea is half completed
When you get it
Through you heart
~~~~~~~

Raiden..

The idea of a production house is random but I think it's important.
And somewhere life is being a little boring new role might come with adventure and refreshness.

But hell I didn't know this need soo much paperwork. Well everything is taking care by Akash and honestly I don't want to know thing untill it's important to know.

And right now the most important question for me is to find a show to start my producing career. Kind of something that is lacking I need something different and honest. Where human feeling are not potray as manipulation. When the problem is nature not a person. When the villian is worth calling villian I mean isn't is important? seeing people just take a prior feeling and made people villian. Story where logic exist, Science work and Pyscology that depicts in character. No one is saint, no one is hero nothing just a plane honesty with nicety. Something I need for myself more than another. Some story where my character depict as just plain human not a villian in anger and a black omen on mankind.

My mind got disrupted by a text from Utkarsh. He work in a non-fiction webseries with me some month's ago and people like our duo together through like would be a understatement from the ongoing #bromance tags on twitter. Well I can't say the same for our off screen bonding. We both are dedicated on our work but he is damn different from me. Except we both don't have parents their is nothing correlate us. He is a damn guy in his strawberry world. Being all bubbly, happy, crazy
shit head. Loving himself way more than needed. Something I should admire but hell all I feel angry and bored.

I open the text to see.

I know you're all that angry man thing but people are searching for our glimpse all over social media. Any coincidental meeting?!

I am currently busy with some business. And if it's coincidental let it be coincidental.

Again saru ┐( ˘_˘)┌

Ohk anything I can help??

You definitely will after shutting your mouth down ^^

Hell how on the earth I message you. Live in your peaceful ignorance hell Bye bye

I ended the chat with him. Completely unfazed with his beautiful words.

Opening email I take a look at all ongoing work when my mind goes to one particular email. Like again from more than a year. I open it type the reply trying to send it hell I can't. I remove them and go to work again.

Well maybe Utkarsh is right I am living in my ignorance. Sometimes it sucks but it's better than confronting something and just end everything. Atleast I had left something to even consider and I know with the reply this will be over too. He still manage to send me email every freaking day since the whole one year. And again I am ignoring like always never confronting never replying.

The knock in my door break me from my tiny self destructing battle. Well living with everything smiling against camera being everyone idol. I did forget to be my own idol. Everytime everything I did was selfish but still didn't manage to find that khusi (happiness) what my parent use to talk about. The happiness they find  with each other. SOLACE the fancy term they use. Living me here alone. You guys actually had guts to show yourself the best and than leave me with someone I don't even know. Someone who only think me as a carrier to take his money and power forward. Who don't know what is the meaning of warmth. YOU GUYS LEAVE ME.

I talk to akash and give my signature and lean back to my life. Well strangely someday I don't have time for even a single nap and here I am almost free but anxiety tripper.

Starting something is indeed a big risk and when I don't even have a good show to start with. I really want something so honest and real something raw which has it's own share of wrong, mistakes, imperfections. Not something perfect what screenwriter says nowadays. I call a single person I can trust who will give me an honest answer. Either a writer or simply no as answer.

"Hello Mr. Ahuja right?"

" Hello Raiden what happen calling out of sudden?"

"Hello sir thank you for accepting call first of all and your time. I am actually working on opening a production house..."

"Ohk that's soo nice congratulations to you."

" And I want to ask if you have listen any story or meet some writer which help me in the opening show of my house."

" Ohk what kind of story are you searching for?"

" A story  which is more human? I mean I want some different story something real, raw.... I mean oh god I can't put it in words"

" haha you're such a child Raiden. Ohk I get it what you're searching. But No I don't listen any kind of story as in now.
What are producing by the way? A TV Series, web series or movie?"

"Ohk I get it. Well right now thinking about a TV show."

" Well I don't know any story but I met a writer last night. I think she might have something for you."

"Ohk well please give me her previous write ups and contact details I will go in for a talk to her"

" Well she is not a professional writer. But she did write a skit I watch yesterday and she is talented"

" Umm will you have video of her skit?"

" I forgot to take. But the college will upload it in coming weeks. You want me to ask her?"

"No actually wait! Let the skit come on social media then we will proceed. And if you have any other person in your contacts do tell me."

" Oh I am sure it's no one. Well as you wish but if you excuse me I want to go back to set"

With this he ended the call. A girl Ashish sir is impressed wow she must be the perfect person for my show. But is I am ready for offering someone without having an eye evidence? Obivously Noo, it's more about me than her. She is not even a writer. But I hope she could become one. So halfly the writing job ended right? Hopefully, wait I did not even ask her name. Whoever this life saver Miss. Writer will be.

I get to another ton of Sitting work I need to complete in this new work. Getting license is first of them. Than my email Pop giving me time to analyse that the email come again

It's always feeling that is beholded
Your insecurities just let you never get ahead
Their will be people still left for you
Just holding the past to be part in your future
And I wish I will be on top.

I am not giving up on you, but I start trembling too Ray. I wish you'll reply <3.

~~~~~~~
Insecurities aren't your
Enemy or friend
They are just a little ghost from night
That scare you in dream
But never become reality
~~~~~~~

Wohoo!
That's Raiden For you all guys.
Do tell me your views on it.

I am up for suggestion and critisism.

Well not going to talk alot. Raiden need privacy. So,

Bye bye
~Shrish