Messed Up 2 (Fucked Up)

3- Denial

"I wanted the chips," he says, doing his best to stay calm. Mia realizes she has a bag of chips to her right and he was stretching his arm to get it. "Why are you so distressed?" he asks, hoping Mia will speak her mind and start shouting or maybe punching him. Anything would be better than this loud silence.

"I'm not," Mia says, without adding more.

"I'm not going to eat you."

A loud ha-ha nervously leaves Mia's mouth. "Of course not," she says. Her smile fades away. "But would you?"

"Would I what?"

"Hypothetically I'm a banana, and you're the monkey. Would you eat me or stick me up your ass?"

Oliver looks for any sign of grinning or joking on Mia's face, but she is dead serious. "I can't figure out if you're joking anymore."

"I'm not."

"Are you horny?"

"Just answer the question, bro!"

"Don't 'bro' me!"

"Stop me, bro!"

"I would stick you up my ass!"

Mia gasps, feeling disrespected as if he just cursed her. She gets on her feet and goes to the bathroom to splash some water on her face. Her cheeks are red. Oliver's head falls on the back of the couch and he sighs. Why is it so hard to approach Mia now when she always talks about her feelings and never shuts up?

Mia gets a call from Zoey and takes it. "Hey, honey. How are you?" Zoey says on the phone.

"I'm hot!" Mia says, gasping for air. "I'm confused. I don't know what I'm doing."

"What? Do you have a fever?"

"No. I'm mad."

"Did you confront him?"

"No, but I think I was a banana, and he sucked on me the night of my party as a monkey would."

"Wouldn't that be the other way around?"

"Oh, my God. NO! I—I don't wanna... Not his penis. No—I can't imagine his penis. It's a blank page. No balls, nothing."

"You can't imagine nothing. Poor man has something down there."

"You're supposed to talk sense to me, Zoey!"

"You just compared yourself to a banana. I think common sense is long off the table.."

"I will sleep trying to imagine his penis."

"Ask him then. What is the worst thing that can happen?"

"I can't ask him to show me his penis. What if it's curved? I'll laugh in his face."

"No! I meant ask him if he slept with you!"

"Oh!"

"Why would it be curved?"

"I've seen one before. Can we get back to my problem? What am I supposed to do?"

"Ask him. Worst-case scenario, he's the dad and he doesn't want to get involved. Isn't that what you wanted?"

It is. Mia wanted someone to give her a baby. If Oliver's the father, then she'll somehow be glad. Because she knows he's not some jackass like Jon, who told her in front of everyone that he doesn't want her and only seeks sexual intercourse with her.

"You're right," Mia says. "Best case scenario, he doesn't have a penis and this nightmare can be over."

"That's the best-case scenario in your mind?"