Sidelines ✔️

75 • The mending • 75

"I know it wasn't right now, Charlotte." His crystal blue eyes go glassy as he looks at me. I look away, unable to meet his burning gaze. "But I thought I was looking out for you. As you know, Renae, the boys' mother, was extremely sick. She needed me there with her, and despite the strains on our marriage, I loved her. It wouldn't have been fair to have brought you into that. Cancer doesn't just affect the person suffering from it, Charlie. It weighs down on the people around you. Renae's illness was the most difficult period of mine and the boy's life."

I look away, not knowing what to say. I glance at Harry and notice his eyes have gone glassy after hearing Peter talking about his Mom.

I sighed, realising it was an awful situation. My Moms father died from cancer when I was young, and I know cancer spreads beyond the person who is sick. Yet, despite understanding the reasoning behind why our parents did what they did, it didn't take away the hurt their actions had caused.

"I get why, Peter. But I need you to see that it hurts knowing you were a father to the boys -- to my brothers --, but you pretended you didn't even have a daughter." I say.

"I know that, Charlie, and if you let me, I want the chance to be your father."

"I want that too," I admit, realising I did want Peter in my life. I knew at heart he was a good person, I didn't think anything he had done was malicious, but the hurt was still there. " but I also need time to adjust."

Suddenly, I realise we aren't alone. The newcomer interrupted our conversation, and Peter headed to the back door to talk to them. Meanwhile, I turned to Harry, giving him my full attention as I could tell he was still upset.

"I'm sorry, Harry." I say, "I didn't mean for this whole situation to bring up stuff you'd rather forget. I can't even imagine how it was."

Harry sighs, running a hand through his hair before he gives me a reluctant nod.

"He's right, though, Charl. It was horrible. Cancer's fucked, and everyone in my life acted differently during that time, including our brothers and me. Dad wasn't present half the time. It was like he was there, but it wasn't. It was shit."

I nod, not knowing what to say. I didn't want to talk to him like I knew what he'd experienced because I didn't.

Harry runs his teeth over his bottom lip and glances at me hesitantly before continuing to speak.

"You may hate me for saying this, but part of me gets where my Dad comes from with what he did. Don't get me wrong, I hate what our parents did, but I get some of it. I wasn't nice during the time Mom was sick, Charl. I was a fucking dick —"

Harry cut himself off, running his hand through his hair before letting his glassy hazel eyes meet mine again.

"During that time, I bullied this kid. Fuck — I don't even remember his name now, but I remember how I treated him. He did nothing wrong but exist. His entire existence just pissed me off. One day, I cornered him with some friends. I attacked him — god knows why — I don't even know now, but I know it wasn't right. Dad got called to the Principal's office, and they almost expelled me. I scared the kid so bad he moved schools."

I remember hearing around middle school that you wanted to avoid getting on the wrong side of Harry Lakewood. I knew he might not be the nicest after he had teased me that one time in middle school, but I didn't see why he had such a bad reputation. Being an outsider, I was lucky. Kids usually paid little attention to me, and I kept to myself.

However, that had its disadvantages. I'd experienced my fair share of bullying at school, too, and I wasn't over the moon to know now that my brother had participated in inflicting that kind of behaviour onto someone else.