Raph's Nightmares

Talking about trouble

Walking into my brother's lab isn't my favorite hobby. He is working on something big, his face is shielded by a mask and a blue flame is burning something metallic.

"Don?"

No answer. Only that buzzing sound that seems to penetrate my brain. I realize it's getting on my nerves, so I take a deep breathe.

"DONNIE?"

Now he hears me and puts the flame out. He looks at me through the squared screen that shields his eyes and I can't tell whether he is annoyed or suprised by my visit.

"What up, Raph?"

"Can I talk to you for a sec?"

He hesitates for a little while and I can't help but sighing, maybe a bit too loud. He knows me too well and knows my temper is about to explode. He won't get it, but the situation is highly uncomfortable for me. It's not the lab, it's not Donnie's hesitation. It's the suffocating feeling of helplessness that's overtaking my soul. And I hate feeling helpless. It annoys me to no end. I close my eyes and rub my temples. In the meantime, he's taken off his mask and has sat in a different chair, cross-legged. I stand opposite of him and he raises his eyebrows. Suddenly he realizes. He is sensitive, and I know it, that's why I am here.

"Are you OK?"

He sounds worried, but I am not. I'm mainly annoyed, and mainly by myself.

"Actually..."

Of course, I get interrupted and of course, by our younger brother Mikey, who's entered the lab in a real hurry, screaming his head out. There it goes. I can't keep the beast chained anymore. I yell his name with all the strenght of my lungs and dive to hit him. And I do. In the middle of his stomach, and he flies backwards to crash into the door he has just gone through. Donnie shouts my name at the same time Mikey complains in a very -annoying - loud voice. But it's too late. I run towards Mikey and he smells the danger, so he makes a beeline for the living room.

"How many times - I yell as I run after him - have I told you not to be so annoying?!"

I know Donnie is running after me, trying to talk some sense into my mind. But I won't stop. Mikey is already in the kitchen, and I'm on his heels, out of my mind.

"Do you have any idea...?"

I can't finish the sentence; I haven't noticed that Donnie was so close. He's jumped and grabbed me by the shoulders, making me lose balance. So I'm on the floor, struggling against him, while Mikey bursts out, breathless, some incoherent things like "what's gotten into you, dude?" and stuff of the kind. I don't really know what's gotten into me. I just know my heart is racing and pulsing in my head. My mind is blurry and I can't put two thoughts together. I'm anxious, stressed, at the brink of breaking. And I don't want to admit why.

I give up. I stop struggling and I raise my hands, so Donnie releases me.