𝐟𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 • 𝐍𝐢𝐣𝐢𝐫𝐨 𝐌𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐦𝐢

Chapter 5

"They couldn't do that if they didn't know about me," I muttered, making his eyes widen. 

"y/n," I am starting to fall in love with the way he says my name. "that would still be risky. You don't know how some of the fans are. You don't know what their reaction would be if they found out I like someone." 

"You can never figure it out unless you try it," I whispered, slowly walking to him to see his reaction. I know I promised Ryan I would avoid him, but my heart wanted something else. And as I already learned, you should always follow your heart. Sometimes it knows more than your mind. 

His eyes kept watching me. With every step I did his eyes moved too. Waiting for me to come closer to them. The closer I got to him, the bigger tension I felt between us. I stopped when I was two more steps away from him. Just staring in his eyes, while they watched me. He scanned me with his eyes from head to toes. 

"You want to try it? Really?" He asked, obviously showing me that he still doesn't like the risk. 

"Niji," I started, making his eyes focus only on my eyes once again. "Just think about it please. Because no matter how much you want me to stay away from you I will always be there, waiting and hoping." When his eyes nodded to me and then right after his head did too I just smiled, taking a few steps back. "Goodbye for now, Nijiro." 

"See you later, y/n." He smiled and watched me walk away. 

When I got far enough from the bar I had to stop to scream. Happily of course. I took out my phone right away, still excited as a little kid, trying to find Ryan's number. 

"y/n?" He asked and my heart just kept smiling when I was thinking about what just happened. 

"Hey, Ryan..." I muttered, trying to hide my excitement. 

"Did something happen? I thought you were going to the bar." He said and I just agreed. "What did he do? Should I-" 

I stopped him right away. "No, no, it's okay. Please don't fly to Japan just to beat up Nijiro." I laughed and he sighed a little in relief. 

"Then what is it? Not that I wouldn't have time for you, speak as long as you need, but I am with my mom now. And you know how she is." 

"Oh, sorry!" I yelled right away, continuing to walk to my apartment. "It won't be long, probably. I just...I am too excited!" I yelled again and could tell he was putting his phone more far away from him. He always did that. 

"For what?" He laughed a little. 

"I kind of asked Nijiro to date me. And before you start yelling at me, his eyes aren't like yours." I said with a smile. "His eyes like me too, it's his brain. Brain, that said he will actually think about it." Ryan didn't say anything to that. He just kept silent, listening to the whole thing before answering. I told him everything that happened tonight, in the most detailed way possible and then let him speak. 

"y/n, believe that I'll be happy for you if he calls you tomorrow saying he can't be without you anymore, or any of that shit. But if he doesn't, I will like him way more. Because if he likes you, it's only normal for him that he doesn't want you to get hurt." He said, sighing right after he finished, as if he thought about it more. "I am not saying that if he picks the first choice he is a bad guy though, alright? If he actually calls you, it only means he wants you to be happy, which is something only people that love you want." He added and I had a smile on my face again. 

"Ryan, I know you want the best for me, and I am glad you do. So please, believe in him and me. Do it for me, please." 

"I will," He answered right away. "I always will." 

"Thank you, Ryan." 

"Go to sleep now," he laughed a little and so did I, ending the call soon after. Putting my phone away, still screaming inside of my head like a little kid. 

When I finally got home I was still smiling. Who wouldn't after all? I took off my hoodie, placing it on the chair behind my dining table and walked to my bedroom, changing into my pajamas as always before I sat on my phone, opening my phone before going to sleep. 

Nijiro Murakami posted a story... I stared at the red line around his Instagram profile before I took a screenshot of it, opening the story right after. Just a black screen with "Yes" written all over it. Yes? I watched it for a while, trying to figure out what he wanted to say by that, when it suddenly hit me. YES. He. Said. yes. I opened the chat between the two of us right away, typing as fast as I could. 

'Yes?' I asked, seeing him read the message immediately. 

'Yeah...if you still want to.' Of fucking course I want to! What do you mean?!? 

'I do. Of course I do!'   

'So we're really doing it... going out in secret I mean, right? Like dates and stuff.' 

'Yeah, dates and stuff.' I laughed while reading his message. 

'Great <3' Oh. My. How I wanted to call Izzy right now. I wanted to tell her everything, every little thing I was feeling at the moment and much more, but secrete meant secrete. I knew what I signed up for. It was me who came up with it after all. 

'You don't know how confused I was when I saw your story. It took me some time to figure it out' 

'Ahh I am sorry! Kento's idea really. He said how I should make it public and stuff, but I still wanted to make it something just for us.' And I was smiling again. 

"You make me smile too much. I really like you so much." I sent him a voicemail and soon after received one too. 

"As long as you smile I am happy. 
P.S: I didn't get to say it properly yet, but I like you too." 
When he said that I heard Kento whistle, laughing but really just cheering for him and I had to laugh too. Not just that Nijiro made me happy once again, Kento did too. Because even when no one else was supposed to know, it felt nice knowing there's that one person ( even if it had to be just him for the rest of our lives ) cheering for us and wanting us to be together. 

"I am going to sleep, Nijiro. I'll talk to you later 
P.S: I am smiling like a little kid" I sent another voicemail. 

"Goodnight, y/n." He sent back right away and I just liked his text, putting my phone away right after going to sleep, thinking about him. Just as I used to do until now.