Believe | Blaine Anderson - Glee

Animal

"Okay, I think it's time for a song." Mr. Schue interrupted, trying to brake the tension in the room.

"Every intimate encounter you'll ever have is gonna start with a touch. Hit it!" Ms. Holliday yelled and grabbed a chair.

She pointed to Brittana and I and we joined in on her song, then suddenly all the girls besides Rachel and Quinn were joining in. I made sure to taunt Rachel with how I could be sexy, and she had no magnetism at all.

"Just remember, when you have sex with someone, you're having sex with everyone they've ever had sex with. And everyone's got a random." Ms. Holliday said, once the song was over.

"Well, well, if it isn't my sweet, sweet porcelain." Sue said, approaching Kurt, Blaine and I at the Lima Bean.

"Coach Sylvester, what are you doing here?" Kurt asked and Blaine looked extremely confused.

"Oh, just picking up some coffee. I like my enema's piping hot." She muttered, not looking at any of us.

"This is just how she talks." I whispered into Blaine's ear who nodded.

"Actually boys, I heard that this is a Dalton Academy hangout, and I come in a spirit of fellowship. As you no doubt of heard, I've taken over for the coach of Aural Intensity." She smiled, finally acknowledging Kurt and Blaine, but not noticing me.

"You pushed him down the stairs." Kurt mumbled, and her smile dropped.

"You can't prove that. So, I happen to have some top secret intel. Will Schuester has finally realized that his team's Achilles' heel is their utter lack of sex appeal. The New Directions are getting sexy, and the key to regionals is out-sexing them. And I suspect that the judges are scoring extra for it this year." Sue said, pouring everything she could lay her hands on into her coffee cup, including wrappers of sugar packets.

"Coach? I'm in the New Directions." I laughed, and she looked at me.

"Oh, I didn't see you there, Chihuahua, you were covered by the young, shaven, Tom Selleck. I probably should of looked for a dwarf before I gave you my top secret intel. Chihuahua, Porcelain, Gay Bird, you have just made a very powerful enemy." She walked away and Blaine looked slightly happy about being called Tom Selleck, not caring about being a 'Gay Bird.'

"I think your sexy, don't listen to her. We have to hold an emergency meeting." Blaine looked at me and squeezed my hand then looked at Kurt.

"Why?" Kurt asked, his eyes widening.

"Weren't you listening? The judges have an eye for something new, which means the Warblers gotta do something sexified." He smiled and my face turned red.

"I cannot wait to see that, but I have to go, Quinn's here. I love you!" I straightened his blazer and gave him a quick peck on the cheek then walked out.

I sat in the scaffolding in the large warehouse the Warblers had booked to show off their new sexified routine.

"I would like to welcome the ladies of our sister school, Crawford Country Day. As you know, the Warblers are competing in our show choir's regionals next week, so what we're going for here today ladies, is something a little.. sexy. So we need your input. Are we scream worthy? Do we make your knees turn to jelly? So without further ado, hang on to your bobby socks, girls because we're about to rock your world." Blaine's dramatic introduction practically made my knees turn to jelly and the lisp he had when he said 'Sexy' was my breaking point and I'm sure my knees would of actually given out if I wasn't sitting down.

I found the whole performance entirely sexy, until Kurt joined in and I wasn't mainly turned off because he was my best friend, but because he was making very odd faces, kind of like he was growling like a baby lion. I tried to focus on Blaine and it completely distracted me from Kurt's attempts at being sexy because Blaine grabbed my hand and pulled me up to the top of the structure to dump a bucket of foam everywhere.