Road to Hell

He ran his hand through his hair, the sting of guilt searing. "I never asked for this. I never asked for you to protect me, and I am more than sure I never asked for you to sacrifice yourself for me. You thought I would be happy like this?! Living on the surface without you, you seriously thought I would be able to just go on like nothing happened?! Like you never even existed?!"

He tried to hold back. To rein his spinning thoughts and to swallow every harsh word burning on his tongue, but a memory was trying to take shape from the murky depths of his mind.

He pushed it away.

"Fuck that! Just who do you think you are?!" his voice cut through the silence like a knife, yet the dirt remained still. " I should've been the one to protect you! I should've been the one to abandon everything and just stay with you until the end! I would've found a way –"

He sucked in a breath and stopped, the lump in his throat twisting and oily shame rippling through his veins.

"I would've done everything. I should've done everything," his words were so small, they barely reached his own ears. "I'm such an idiot."

Throat sore and lips parched, his eyes, too, remained dry.

Elbow perched on his raised knee, he let the weight of his head fall into his palm. "What the fuck am I doing? Arguing with a grave. I must've really lost my mind."

"She's still there, you know." A voice from behind him said, yet Levi didn't find the strength in him to care how or why he didn't sense the brat's presence before he heard him talk.

The kid carefully approached him. Levi shot him a sideway glance before he slid his eyes back to her.

He knew she was there. He just didn't want to admit it.

"She can still hear you," Edgar said again and this time, Levi fully noticed the unusual hoarseness in his youthful voice. "She's not just a grave. It's only been a couple of days. Wraith's still there."

"If you say so. Why are you here, brat?"

Edgar watched her grave one last time before facing Levi. His small hands held out a piece of paper, blood and dirt stains on its surface.

Levi stared at the kid, his red-rimmed eyes and runny nose a loud proof of what he'd been doing this past week. It almost made Levi jealous.

Edgar cleared his throat. "She left you this, before she–" Voice breaking and words strained, tears quickly welled up inside the child's eyes once again. "Before she– She told me to... to give this– And I... I didn't read it, I swear! W-wraith told me she was going to teach me how, but the sickness–"

The painful memories tore the boy apart, and Levi couldn't take it anymore.

Pushing his cloak to the side, he took the letter from the child's fingers, before gently ruffling his hair. Edgar's lips opened, wide gaze staring at him in surprise.

"Thanks. We owe it to you. Now I understand why you were always her favorite."

As his words sank in, Edgar's tears streamed free down his blotchy face. He tried to hide, head quickly buried into his elbow, yet the trembling of his back as he sobbed made it impossible.

Levi's features softened, hand patting the boy on the shoulder one more time. "You did well. Thank you for staying by her side when I couldn't."

Edgar's weeps continued to blank the space until the last glimmer of sunlight sank behind the horizon and the light of the Waterfall faded. Levi never told him to leave. Only when his tears dried up and his stomach rumbled, only then did Edgar decide to return to the rest of their people.