When I Look Into Your Eyes (An AU Heartstopper Story)

14 - "this is all my fault"

Charlie [09:06]:  Morning :)

Charlie [09:34]: Nick? Are you there?

Charlie [09:47]: Nick where are you? I'm worried about you

Charlie [09:47]: Your mum's worried too

Charlie [09:56]: Nick please respond

Status: unread

It was 10:17 and all of Charlie's messages were still unread. By now the rain had started pouring uncontrollably and the streets were starting to flood. A tear fell down Charlie's cheek. He was so worried about Nick.

"It's really chucking it down!" Sarah said whilst she looked out of the window. She turned to Charlie, who was sitting on the couch with his phone in his hands. He looked down at the ground. Sarah noticed that he wasn't feeling like himself, so she walked up to Charlie and sat down next to him. She placed her arm over his shoulders, which made Charlie look up at her. She could tell that he'd been crying. "Oh honey," She said while she wrapped both her arms around Charlie, hugging him. "He'll be okay, I'm sure," she whispered. Charlie started sobbing quietly. "I...I'm just so worried about him." Sarah's heart broke seeing Charlie like this. "He...he hasn't responded to any of my texts," Charlie stuttered. Sarah didn't really know how to respond to this statement, so she just stayed quiet and hugged Charlie even tighter.

"Sarah?"

"Yes, love?"

Charlie stayed quiet. He looked up at Sarah. "You can tell me," She said with a soft smile. Charlie looked down again.

"It's about Nick," he said after another moment of silence. "He's not doing okay."

-

Nick had made it to the bandstand in their local park. It was a place he and Charlie had visited a million times. They went there to see bands playing, to have picnics with Tao, Elle, Isaac, Tara and Darcy or to just chill out and watch the sunset. It was one of their favourite places. It looked kind of sad without the music and other people. But it's not like he had anywhere else to go. Besides, it had started pouring down, so he needed a place to hide from the rain.

Nick took his phone out of his pocket to check the time. But when he tried to unlock his phone it didn't do anything. He tried to turn it on again, but the screen stayed black. "You serious?" He sighed. Apparently, his phone hadn't been charged all the way and now his battery died. Nick sat down on the floor of the bandstand and looked around him. Judging by the colour of the sky and the intensity of the little light that came through the dark clouds, it could've been anywhere between 8:00 and 12:00 am. So that really didn't help. Nick debated whether he should go home or not. He eventually decided to wait for the rain to get less intense before heading home.

-

Charlie hadn't been able to tell Sarah more than that, because he broke down right after saying those two sentences. But Sarah could see that he was really worried about her son. She'd be lying if she said that she wasn't a bit worried as well.

Sarah looked Charlie in the eyes. Charlie looked up and whilst closing his eyes, he said: "A couple of days ago he told me that he wasn't feeling right. We haven't talked about it since then, but I've got a feeling that this has been going on for a little while now. I don't really know what's going on, but he isn't acting like himself lately. And now he's gone." Sarah's eyes were filled with concern as she looked at Charlie. "This is all my fault," Charlie whispered.

"Honey, no it's not your fault. You can't do anything about this." Sarah said. "If anything, I feel like you're the only reason he hasn't gone completely insane yet." Charlie chuckled. "Thanks for telling me, love. That was very brave of you." Charlie hugged Sarah. Love and warmth radiated through her hug. "Do you have any clue where Nicky might be? We could try to find him." Sarah said eventually.

"I think I might have an idea," Charlie said.