Shared Agony // Aguni Morizono x reader

7. "My sky is ashen"

'Don't do it, Aguni, listen to me.'

'I have to.'

'No, you don't. Just think about it for a second.'

'I already have. This is simply what I must do.'

'Please! You'll regret it!'

'Why would I?'

You grabbed onto his arm as he brought the razor up to his face, looking intently at his reflection in the mirror so he wouldn't cut himself.

'It's your beard!' you yelled in a panicked voice. 'I was only joking, I love your beard! I love your mustache! I love it all SO STOP THIS MADNESS!'

Finally, Aguni put the razor down and you couldn't help but sigh with relief.

'I'll keep the beard just for you,' he said, voice full with self-satisfaction. You hit him hard in the stomach, eager to wipe that smug look off his face, but he didn't budge.

'Asshole,' you mumbled as you rubbed your painful knuckles. That man was made of fucking steel.

You and Aguni were standing in the bathroom of a penthouse in the heart of Tokyo. The building was about seventy stories high, and you had a great view of the surroundings, enabling you to keep an eye out for the King of Spades. You'd spent the last two days here together, only going out to look for food and water. The rest of your time, you spent together doing nothing and everything at the same time.

'JACK!' you screamed, slapping the jack of hearts Aguni just put down. With a triumphant smile, you took the entire stack of cards and added it to your growing pile.

He frowned. 'You're too good at this game. I don't like it.'

'Yes, you do.'

'No, I don't.'

'Shut up, you love me. Now be a good boy and put down a card.'

A long silence followed, with the only sound being the fast tapping of cards against the wooden floor.

Seven of hearts. Six of spades. Queen of clubs.

Jack of spades.

Your hand shot forward. This time, Aguni was faster, and he slapped the card just before you could. You growled in frustration and put your hair up in a ponytail.

Aguni snorted. 'Oh, so we're getting serious now?'

'You bet,' you answered, eyes on the card he was about to lay down.

Card after card after card. Ace of spades, six of diamonds, and so on. Until suddenly:

King of spades.

You'd already raised your next card to lay it on top of the messy pile, but it now hung frozen in the air.

You put it back down and raised your eyes to look at Aguni.

'We should go after him.'

'I know.'

'People continue to die at his hands. We can stop this, I know we can.'

'I know.'

You threw your hands up in frustration. 'So why haven't we left yet?'

'You know why.'

You did. You knew all too well. It was easy to sit around in an ivory tower; this expensive apartment. It was easy to pretend like people weren't dying out there and it was easy to pretend like the world outside your safe little bubble didn't exist.

Aguni leaned forward and took your hand, pulling you towards him. You let him take you in his arms and allowed your head to rest in the crook between his neck and shoulder. He put his arms around you and held you, saying nothing – sweet nothing, and nothing had never sounded so good before.

You curled up against his chest and listened to the beating of his heart. You smiled. It was beating fast.

'Let's just pretend a little while longer,' Aguni said.

'Okay,' you replied. And after a bit, you whispered: 'There will come a time where we don't have to pretend.'

Aguni rested his chin on the top of your head. 'I know. I'll make sure of it.'

'Of course you will, you big muscular man.'

A silence. You could almost feel his faint smile appear and disappear.

'Tomorrow, we'll come up with a plan on how to kill him,' Aguni said. The King of Spades.

'Tonight...' He hesitantly looked down at you. 'Would you like to read to me? I know you like reading. And I like listening.'

The request was so simple, yet so sweet and genuine, your heart was set ablaze and burned to ashes in an instant.

You smiled. 'I will.'

Aguni made tea, the same kind he'd made for you that second morning: star anise, cinnamon and ginger. For some reason, it tasted and smelled like home. As the light outside started to fade, you went to the bedroom and positioned yourself against the wooden headboard.

You pulled Aguni against you and he rested his head on your lower abdomen, one arm curled behind your back and the other caressing the sensitive skin around the injury on your upper leg. Aguni had taken the bandage off that day and the wound was almost fully healed now.

You'd picked out a poetry book: the collected works of Mahmoud Darwish, translated of course. You'd always found him a fascinating writer.

You asked Aguni if he was okay with your choice, to which he replied: 'Even if you'd read from the local newspaper, I'd be satisfied.'

You almost threw the book at his face for comparing Mahmoud Darwish to a newspaper, but then you started reading.

'My sky is ashen. Scratch my back. And undo slowly, you stranger, my braids. And tell me what's on your mind.'

Aguni exhaled deeply, and from the corner of your eye you saw him close his eyes. You felt his body relax against yours, and you read on.

'My sky is ashen, as a blackboard is ashen, before writing on it. So write with my blood's ink anything that changes it.'

He kept stroking your leg, drawing faint circles and lines with his fingers. Writing invisibly and illegibly.

'What time is it now? What's the name of this place we're in? And what's the difference between my sky and your land.'

Aguni loved watching you sleep. What he didn't know was that you'd come to love watching him sleep too. You kept reading until his breathing became steady and soft and his fingers no longer moved, resting against your warm skin.

'My sky is ashen, so what do you think of when the sky is ashen?'

~~~~~

Little fluffy intermezzo because, honestly, we deserve it. :) The poem I quoted from is called Two Stranger Birds in Our Feathers by Mahmoud Darwish. His writing is absolutely magical so I had to include it.

I hope you all enjoyed; leave a comment or vote if you like. You'll hear from me again soon! 

Lots of love and take care,

Anna