Best Served Fake

forty-two // romantically bone down

Kai hated it that everyone reduced him to being just one thing, just one guy. Kai Delaney, charming enough, but hardly the right sort, if you know what I mean. I was not going to reduce him to the same thing. I wasn't going to assume he didn't want me just because everyone else probably did.

But there was always the possibility that he just didn't like me. Romantically.

Then again, he didn't exactly shy away from sticking his tongue down my throat, so I was going to take that as a positive.

I smiled at Cole and Madeleine, and it was a little bit shy, bashful and blushing, akin to Seb's smile, which was self-conscious in a way that was so unlike the rest of his friends—Kai's flirty and deliberate, Jamie's cutting and self-aware, Will's slow and untouched by any hardship, Isabelle's completely wide and bright—a smile so unlike my usual smile that was brash and sarcastic. It was the kind of smile that belonged on a princess from some long-forgotten court, her hand outstretched to some handsome paramour. I wanted to reach out my hand. I wanted to be brave enough for that. "Yeah. I don't know, but I think he might be."

Madi rolled her eyes. "Of course he is. Have you seen the way that boy looks at you? It's like you're the very short, very strawberry blonde sun of his universe. A sun that he is very sexually attracted to and won't lose his favourite bits by putting them near, which I'm sure is an additional bonus for him."

My heart went weird for a whole five seconds. I might have to consult a doctor, because I don't know that it's normal for vital organs to perform elaborate dance routines and backflips inside the human chest.

"And for Valerie," Cole pointed out. "She wants all his favourite bits up in her favourite bits. The sword in the stone.  The spider in her lady cave."

"Yuck." I made a face. Then I unfurled it. "But a little bit true."

"A lot bit true," Cole challenged. He waved a finger in my face, and I responded in a manner very unprofessional for the workplace by sticking my middle finger up at him. "Don't even try to deny in missy, I can see it written all over your face. You want to get dicked down by Delaney so hard. You are, and spell it with me, H-O-R—"

Madeleine cleared her throat. "Hey, hi, what are you doing here?"

I slowly lowered my arm and the extended middle finger attached to it when I saw who had materialised beside Cole. "Kai?"

"Hey," he said, his face untouched by confusion or amusement, which suggested he thankfully hadn't heard the contents of my conversation with Cole the dipshit idiot.

"We weren't just talking about your dick," the aforementioned dipshit idiot said, sticking out his hand for an extremely confused Kai to shake. "Hey, Delaney. Nice to see you."

Kai shook the proffered hand. "Uh, you as well, Knight. Been a while, man." Then he raised an eyebrow at me. "All good things I hope?"

Madeleine, who was easily the boldest of us all, (you would assume it was Cole, but he wasn't bold, he was just stupid and didn't seem to be embarrassed enough about his behaviour for his loudmouth to be considered bravery), shrugged at Kai. "Sorry, no one here has ever tested out the product to give an accurate review. If you want one that's comprehensive, I would suggest whipping it out for Valerie. I've heard she really takes her time to get to know the product so she can give out some really accurate information for future customers."

I was going to throttle Madeleine.

My cheeks were almost certainly a violent red, blood rushing to my cheeks with the force of a tsunami, and I snatched the full glass of water next Cole's half-drained vodka and drained half of it to hide my deep mortification.