Somewhere in Between

v. the severed ties

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OLIVIA

"This guy seriously gave me a fucking D."

"You've been gone two weeks and you're already fucking someone?"

"Bitch, are you even listening? I'm literally talking about my grade right now."

"Oh shit," Alissa giggles on the other end of the line. "My bad. A D isn't that bad, right? Does that mean you passed?"

"Barely," I huffed, pressing my phone between my shoulder and ear as I shove the pathetic revision paper into my tote. "He should've just given me an F. I swear this professor has some kind of vendetta against me."

"Who cares," Alissa drawled. "You know no one expects you to go through with this long term, right? Just come back. We miss you."

I care. Why would I be ranting to my best friend if I didn't care? It was only my second week here, apparently enough time for Alissa to think I should throw in the towel.

Give up. Give up and prove everyone right.

"I don't want to come back," I gritted out. The thought of crawling back home a failure on top of what I'd done was enough motivation I needed to get my shit together. Even if it meant asking for extra credit.

God, it sounds mortifying just thinking about it. I'd never had to ask for anything like that. Contrary to what people thought about me I wasn't stupid, I'd always done well in school. But I'd graduated high school over a year ago. I was a little rusty, that's all this was. Right?

"You can't avoid what you did forever. You're a homewrecker, so what? You didn't kill anyone. Everyone's over it already. Just own it."

I hated that word. I'm not trying to shift the blame, I'd accepted it, but it takes two—so why was I the only one getting shunned for it?

Adjusting my bag digging into my shoulder, I released a puff of air in frustration. "You don't think I can do college either, huh?"

"It's not that. I'm not saying it to be a bitch, okay? I just don't get it. You don't need to be there. You don't even know anyone. You have no friends there—"

"Are you kidding?" I cut her off, taking a quick glance around as I walked through the quad, feeling the never ending eyes of the majority of the students I passed. "Everyone wants to be my friend."

"Right," she scoffed on the other end of the line. "Everyone wants to be your friend because they want to fuck you—or your brother. There's no in between. Trust me, it's been like that since you started growing that rack of yours."

Ouch. It was like that was the only thing I was good for. Like I didn't have anything else to offer. That was just Alissa. She had a real gift at making me feel like shit about myself.

"Do you have something to tell me then? You are my best friend," I sneered back, glancing at my chrome nails gleaming back at me in the sunlight peeking through the clouds.

Every one of my friends went all googly eyed when my brother was around and Alissa was no exception. She'd practically lived at my house to see more of him, even when he was out of town filming. As far as I know it hadn't happened yet due to the age difference, but we're all over eighteen now. There's no excuse anymore. Get him drunk and it'll happen. I could hear the conversation now. Tripped over and fell right onto his lap. It slid right in, a happy accident she'd call it.