A Taylor Christmas

Chapter 3 - Weirdos

It is very quiet for, like, an eternity and I start to feel a tiny bit guilty for reacting so violently, but really only a tiny bit. She better not be hurt or I won't hear the end of it from old man Josh. Butt face has a very bad track record when it comes to getting hurt when she's acting like an idiot and fooling around with Noah. It is advisable to stay out of their way when they are in weirdo-mode so that you don't get in between them by accident and end up being involved without ever wanting to be.

Their super childish behavior is one of the main reasons why I doubt that I am really sharing their blood. I mean, I get it that butt face is acting dumb, because she doesn't know any better, still being a baby and all.

But Noah is almost ten years old!

He should stop playing silly games with her and act his age. I mean, I don't get why he even spends time with her at all. She has nothing interesting to offer, her toys are lame, she's totally into playing with her stupid-ass plushies and if you're really unlucky, she forces you to have a tea party. Butt face also always wants to try our much cooler stuff and she either ends up making a fool out of herself, like, for example, when she unsuccessfully tries to work our electric race cars, or she breaks things. Which is super annoying.

I don't understand why Noah sometimes chooses to play with her instead of hanging out with me. I have asked him that a few times already and he once told me that he prefers to hang out with "real sunshines", which kinda pissed me off. Ever since Will called me "a regular sunshine" in a very sarcastic tone when they were complaining about me being moody, my "twin" likes to tease me about it.

I mean, come on. If anyone in this family is the opposite of a sunny personality, it's Will himself, so I found his remark pretty stupid.

He's like a walking rain cloud every day!

I should have told him this when he made that sunshine remark, but unfortunately, I only thought of it too late. Normally, I am not one to struggle with good comebacks. Another reason why I doubt that I am actually Noah's twin. Alex says I have a way with words for my age, whatever that's supposed to mean, and Ben calls me quick-witted. I like to believe that they mean that in a good way.

"Lils, you okay?" Noah enquires from his spot on the other side of the room, reminding me of the situation at hand.

I look at the floor and find Josh crouching down next to butt face and see her laughing and squirming around to get away from his hands. It looks like he's trying to check her for injuries but she's obviously fine, if the girly giggles are anything to go by.

"Bad weeds grow tall," I grumble, earning myself one of Josh's infamous glares.

"That's enough out of you," he scolds me.

"You didn't have to shove her like that," Noah says pointlessly.

Like, who is he and why does he have to defend her?

She shouldn't have jumped on me in the first place and then I wouldn't have had to push her. Easy.

"She didn't do it on purpose!" Noah defends her, again.

Oops.

I must have said that out loud.

"She's still alive, so what do you want?" I groan, throwing myself against the sofa's back rest with a huff.

"Revenge!" Noah shouts.

This battle call is all it takes and before I can put one and one together, both weirdos attack me full force. Noah is apparently quicker than butt face, because he lands on me first, soon followed by another, smaller weight, landing both on top of me and on top of him. I instinctively try to shove them off me, which results in a proper wrestling match. I am just about to gain the upper hand, having already pinned weirdo #2 underneath me, when a sharp whistling sound cuts through the air.