Coney Island

Chapter 3

Once I arrived back home, I immediately went for a bubble bath. The jets of hot water felt divine on my tense muscles. I lay there trying my best to ignore the nagging feeling of guilt that was weighing heavily on my chest. I told myself I hadn't done anything wrong by agreeing to meet up with Karlie tonight. It wasn't like I was meeting her for a hookup. No, I just needed answers. Answers that only she could give me. 

Even if I told Joe that I had seen her, I doubted he would be bothered. He trusted me, and the only reason I hadn't told him was because I didn't want him to worry about me. He knew how badly Karlie hurt me, after all, he was the one that helped me through the breakup. i had been a mess and the situation c aused me to slip into a deep depression where I didnt eat, sleep or take care of myself. All I did was write music. I wrote two albums in the space of a year and ended up burning myself out. I was in a really bad place and at one point, I seriously thought about ending it all. 

Joe helped me through that, and I didnt want him to think that meeting up with Karlie again would make me spiral, because it wouldn't. I was stronger now, and all I wanted from her was closure which I would get tonight. And after that, we wouldn't even be living in the same country, so it wasn't like we would see each other again. So realistically, there was no need to tell Joe and have him worry about nothing. 

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A few hours later, I was standing in front of my mirror, scrutinizing my outfit. I looked good, really good, but I was worried that maybe I had made too much of an effort. I was conflicted; did I put on something more casual? Or did I just keep the outfit I had on? It wasn't too revealing, but It definitely showed some skin. 

'I'm overthinking things,' I muttered to myself as I stepped back from the mirror. I was going in the outfit I had on. There was no harm in looking good. Karlie always looked stunning, and I didn't want to look like I had just thrown something on, but I also didn't want to look like I had made a special effort for her. I hadn't; I didn't care what she thought. Her opinion was irrelevant to me. I chose this dress because I liked it, not because I knew she would. Absolutely not. 

I pulled up outside the bar an hour later. I'd had my driver pull around to the back entrance; the last thing I needed was to be papped. That would have been a disaster. I entered the bar through the back door and smiled as a familiar face greeted me. 

'Miss Swift,' nodded Jazz, the bar owner, 'I never thought I'd see you here again. It's been eight years.' He took my coat before he kissed me on the cheek. 

I was impressed that he apparently remembered that last time I was here. 'To be honest, I never thought. I'd step foot back into this place, either. Too many memories. But it's good to see you, you're looking really well,' I replied with a warm smile. 

I hadn't come here since Karlie and I broke up. It was our place, and it didn't feel right to come here alone. I had a feeling she hadn't stopped, though. 

Jazz nodded. 'Thank you, as do you. Now, follow me, and I will show you where your date is,' he said with a wink before he began to move. 

Date? It wasn't a date. 'Oh no,' I said as I jogged a little to catch up with him, 'it isn't a date. We're just friends, in fact we are not even that. We're just two people who used to be in love, but now we're not. She's married. I'm getting married. It's definitely NOT a date,' I rambled as we walked side by side. 

Jazz stopped outside a black door. 'This is one of our private rooms. You're not-date is inside waiting for you,' he used air quotes the "not" part, causing me to roll my eyes, 'only I am aware that you are here, and I'm a master in discreteness. So don't worry, and enjoy your night,' he said before disappearing.