Card of Heart

Chapter 3 - Front Runners

"Sure," the Togruta agrees immediately, and the two of them slip out of the main room to find a private space to talk in peace.

"How have you been?" Lux queries.

"Oh, same," she shrugs. "Fighting a war."

"That's quite a thing for a sixteen-year-old to be doing all the time."

Ahsoka scoffs. "Look who's talking. You're literally leading a rebel movement."

"Well, maybe we're just getting more similar," he replies, smiling softly.

"Maybe," she agrees, smiling back. When they first met back on Raxus about a year ago, she would never have expected they'd end up becoming as close as they are now. "How have you been?" she asks finally.

"Busy with working on trying to free Onderon. I haven't really had much time for anything else, and I won't until this is over," Lux replies, then brightens, "But hey, with each planet that gets out of this war, the closer we'll be to peace in the galaxy. And then maybe we can see each other more often."

"I hope so," she agrees. She really, really does. He offers her a sense of calm that no one else has ever been able to give, at least not since Hardeen shattered her entire view of... everything she believed in. She aches to stay here with him, except nothing is that simple. She's not going to leave Anakin like that. Or the Order, even if there are frequently moments where she wishes she didn't have to stay.

"Is something wrong?" Lux asks suddenly, studying her quietly. She didn't think it would be so easy for him to tell.

"Well... yes," she admits.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Sometimes... I've thought about leaving the Order."

"Really? Why?" He seems slightly startled by the admission, for which she isn't surprised. She'd told him before that she never would.

This... it's never something easy for her to think about, to question everything she was raised believing. But it's certainly easier to talk about this to someone who isn't a Jedi. She knows he won't judge her for it. "They aren't what they're supposed to be," Ahsoka confesses at last, "I mean we've been fighting for over two years, and it doesn't seem like we're any closer to winning the war than when we started. Why can't we work out a more peaceful solution?"

"That's what I've been wondering this whole time," he agrees.

"And now it often seems they're listening far more to the Senate than doing what's right." Like with the case of Hardeen. Yes, protecting Palpatine is important, but why did it have to be like that? There were many other methods they could have used aside from that one. For that matter, why did they have to pick Obi-Wan for the mission at all?

"Well, if you want, you can always stay on Onderon," Lux offers, "We'd all be happy to have a Jedi here permanently." He's speaking for himself, too, she knows.

"I'd love that, but that's not really an option at the moment," she sighs frustratedly. As much as she'd like to stay and not go back to the Order, she'll never leave Anakin like that. If it's a choice between him and Lux, there's not even a question on who she'd choose. Besides, she's doesn't even know anything about life outside the Order anyway.

"If you ever change your mind, we'll always be happy to have you."

She smiles, emotion surging in her, the urge to just be with him. She leans closer instinctively, wrapping her arms around him. Anakin's hugged her before on occasion, but it's not really a thing Jedi do. Not when they get older. Anakin's always been a little different in that way.