Return of the one long gone

My medicine is you

So he let Scott leave, crying into the latter's pillow every night until his scent was washed away by salty tears. He started wearing Scott's clothes. They fit him fine, unlike his which looked bigger on Scott. He didn't care. It was a reminder that he couldn't lock himself away. He had to keep being a King and a friend to the other people.

The world didn't consist of just Scott. He had always known that, but he had always ignored it.

- - - -

Scott's eyes were refusing to open, content to let him stay trapped in the comfort of darkness and sleep. But he wanted to see Jimmy and his friends, wanted to start returning to normal and that wasn't cowering in safety.

So, with a bit of force, hr managed to open his eyes fully, letting them land on his fiancé, who was sleeping in a chair next to his bed, body folded over so his head was buried in Scott's neck, right arm draped across his middle and left hand still in Scott's hair. And as soft a moment it was, he feared Jimmy would be in pain from the strange angle when he woke.

Scott shook his fiancé gently, whispering his name like a prayer. 

- - - -

Jimmy was being moved by someone, he could tell by the hand on his shoulder. Whoever it was were gentle and caring, the same way Scott had been with him before his disappearance.

"Jimmy? Flower, wake up." That's why it felt so similar to how the cyanette used to do, because it was Scott. Scott, who he should be angry at. Scott who wasn't there for two years and then waltzed back into their lives. Scott who almost died in front of him. Scott who he could never be mad at. 

Scott, his fiancé, the love of his life, his anchor, his world, his air and lifeforce. Scott, who was finally home, safe. 

Jimmy broke down, wrapping his arms around Scott and sobbing into his shoulder. And Scott, the person who should be resting, the one who should be crying after the evident trauma he had been through, just held him, murmuring sweet nothings into his ear like it would make him feel any better that he had almost lost him and hadn't been there.

- - - -

Scott doesn't remember when Jimmy moved to lay on the bed with him, or when the blonde had finally calmed down and fallen asleep from crying so much. He didn't mind, he finally got to card his fingers through Jimmy's hair and listen to his soft breathing as he slept.

Scott didn't realize how much he had missed Jimmy until he had him back in his arms, albeit crying. He had never meant to hurt Jimmy the way he had, only sort to protect him, not realizing the sacrifices everyone had to make in his absence. 

He had been so consumed by the fear of letting Xornoth hurt everyone around him, he forgot that there was strength in numbers and that he was strong enough to take Xornoth down. He had proved that yesterday. At least what he hoped was yesterday.

- - - -

Asthanae was one of Rivendell's best healers and had been tasked with getting Scott back home as soon as possible. Not because she wasn't happy to see him back, but his rightful place wasn't the infirmary. They knew the King would also want to return to duty as soon as he could, even if that meant disobeying Asthanae's orders. 

They walked into the room to find Scott happily watching a sleeping Codfather. He had a look on his face she recognized. It was the one he would always give Jimmy as a child. He may not have known it back then, his advisors ingraining the thought of a wife and kids securely into his head, but he had never wanted any of the girls he was presented with. They knew, from the moment he saw Jimmy, Scott was in love.

It was a scene they hadn't seen for a while, pure relaxation and fondness on Scott's face as he forgot the stresses of royal life. They were reluctant to break the moment, but Asthanae was sure the couple could cuddle more in the comfort of the King's personal bed. 

"My Lord?"

"Asthanae! Good to see you."

"You as well my King, Your tests are clear, you are discharged." They smiled as they left. It was unclear exactly what Scott had endured during his 2 years away from home. But it was clear he was relieved to be back. 

- - - - 

Jimmy hadn't spoken the short walk to Scott's house but it was beginning to concern him. The man was usually a ball of energy, talking to any Rivendell citizen who passed them by or telling Scott facts he was probably never going to use, just to fill the silence.

Jimmy hated silence. 

So why the Cod emperor wasn't saying a word was making Scott uncomfortable. It was almost like he was walking back without Scott, like he had died after finally removing Xornoth from his life.

Even in Scott's room, bed still made and everything where it was, Jimmy just sat on the bed and looked at him, eyes empty and dark. Every glimmer in them Scott used to count, the small smile he always seemed to have, it was gone, replaced with this. He wondered if this was who Jimmy had become once Scott left.

Now Scott had plenty of disturbing and frightening thoughts, the small voice in his head nagging and insisting he was always wrong, that he should have died with his brother, he was used to that. But the concept of being the reason Jimmy looked like a hollow casing with nothing but blood keeping him from dying.

"I could have lost you." It isn't malicious or angry, but the hurt and pain flowed through each syllable as Jimmy finally talked to him.

"I know flower, I know."

"Then why'd you do it." 

"To protect you all. Xornoth said it himself, he was going to kill you all. I had to stop him."

He wasn't sure it was just that, Scott was fairly sure he was so scared of being a failure in the eyes of everyone around him that he ran because he was a coward. He ran away because it was the easiest choice he could make. It didn't take planning he might not have had the time for, it didn't rely on him being certain, or a leader. It was just him, the wild and a game of chase. 

"What if you'd died."

"I almost did. When I fell off the ledge. I got the choice to come back or let this life go."

To be truthful, Scott had really only come back for Jimmy, to make sure his last moments weren't painful and watched over by his brother, who would of thought of it as entertainment.

- - - -

Jimmy was done with trying to figure out what he was feeling, he just grabbed Scott and kissed him, soft and chaste, but enough to say millions of words without having to open his mouth. It was all the missed 'I love yous' and hugs. It was all the time wasted on something that was fated to die from the beginning. It was the wedding plans and day they never got to have because Scott wasn't there.

They would have time for all of that later, but in that moment, Jimmy just dragged Scott down onto the bed and snuggled up to him, whispering I love you as the letter said it back; trading kisses until the sun went down and they slept together for the first time in 2 years.

Healing would take time, but they would get through it, together.

~ ~ ~ ~

Longest chapter yet!

(not-proof-read)