life is short.

The Beginning

Now I know what you're thinking. "Oh You're such a bad boyfriend liking another girl while with someone." I can explain. I've been on thin ice with this so called girlfriend since i met her. I don't know how i feel about calling her "girlfriend" so we'll just call her R. For this story, i need to go back to when i met her. I met R in 7th grade science class. She didn't talk much and i thought she was unique. I was new to florida and everything about it when i met her and didn't know what i would need to look for in a girl. I added her on Snapchat maybe a couple of weeks after we met in person. We started talking and we just felt a somewhat connection. I spent all my energy and well-being on this relationship. i went through depression and back with this girl. The first time we ever fought was maybe 2 months or so into our relationship. I had a friend, We'll call her J. She was friends with me way before i met R. I could come to her about anything. At the time me and J were talking, R didn't have a phone. I used to facetime her and text her occasionally and we would be the best of friends. R didn't like this. She told me to stop being friends with her or we were done. I cut ties with J so R wouldn't be mad at me. A few weeks after R got her phone back, She demanded my instagram and snapchat passwords. I didn't think much of it, until she texted me telling me i was lucky i wasn't single then and there. She saw i had a few girls on my snapchat i never even interacted with, and a couple of girls i followed on instagram. I deleted snapchat and instagram so she wouldn't be mad at me. I spent the last few dollars i had on this girl to get her the things she wanted and needed so she would be happy, yet she never was. She told me she was depressed and i told her i know what it feels like. I felt like i'd have a connection at least there and we could talk it out. She told me i had no idea and i was forced to not talk about it. I've never been more depressed in my life. I've never been one to break someone's heart, And i know by leaving R, i'd for sure shatter it. So i never left. I endured the most i've ever endured in my life to try and keep this girl happy. Yet she never was. Don't get me wrong of course i loved her, She didn't love me though. It was September 10th, 2022. I woke up and texted R Good morning. She texted back like always. Everything seemed to being going as usual. We facetimed for almost 2 hours. I could sense something was wrong. I'd ask her a question and she'd take a minute or two to respond. I could hear her typing on her phone like she was texting someone. i thought nothing of it. She tells me "Hey i'm gonna go take a shower okay? I'll call you back. Love you." She hangs up. Little did i know that was the last time i'd hear i love you from her. She texted me 10 minutes later that she needed to tell me something. I told her she could tell me anything. She said she wanted to break up. I couldn't bring myself to text back. I turned my phone off and sat in bed for the rest of the day. "If she put you through so much pain, Why did you feel sad when she left?" Because when you give someone two years of your life, it tends to make a mark on you. I went through the worst depression i've ever been in for like two weeks. I was getting high every night and sneaking henessey from the top of the fridge in the morning. I ghosted everyone and stayed in my room. come to find out, She was texting another guy. We'll call him N. He had been texting her for 4 months. She considered breaking up with me for 4 months. I don't know. It was october 1st when i got a text from a random number. it was a 772 number so it was from around here. "you didn't deserve that😕💙" I texted back "Who's this?"

"Oh it's K"