and i cannot control it (the way you're making me feel) | patpran oneshot

and i cannot control it (the way you're making me feel)

"Okay, okay," Korn says through laughs. "So my aunt told me that through every story they've heard and every test they've done there's only one way for the goose to leave..." he says, his voice dragging out at the end, intentionally creating a moment for suspense.

Pran huffs out a groan.

"True love's kiss," Korn says, making his voice sound like he's reading a storybook.

Pat and Pran lock eyes.

Then Pran swallows and squeezes his eyes shut and opens them like he's rebooting his system. "Are you sure?" he asks, leaning towards Pat's phone.

"Yes, Pat's soulmate!" Korn replies. "She also said the kiss doesn't have to mean anything. There have been some pairs that kiss and never speak again." Korn lets out a ruckus laugh. "Ha, their loss. if the universe matched me with someone through a goose I'd never let the person go."

Pat catches Pran's gaze. Pat doesn't take his eyes off of him as he asks, "What if they hate you? Would you still want to be with them then? If you know they don't want you and you'll just be a burden to them?"

Pran stills. His eyes go glassy and doe-like and almost afraid again.

Korn replies, "Man, what? As if that would ever happen. And if it did I would try my best to talk with them. I don't think the universe would pair me with someone that hates me, so the person is either deeply repressing their emotions or lying about them."

At that, Pran breaks eye contact, turning his attention to the sleeping goose on the floor.

Something sparks in Pat's chest. It's not big, but it's something. And that's enough. He hurriedly replies, "Okay Korn. Thanks. I'll, uh, talk to you later."

"You better! And bye Pat's soulmate! Hope you guys have a good kiss! Mwah!"

Pat hangs up and lays his phone back on the table. His hands are jittery, so he puts them on his knees, his fingers tapping rapidly. "So now we know what we have to do," Pat says, trying to fill the space.

"Let's just get it over with," Pran mutters, still not looking at him.

From Pat's spot on the table, Pat can only see the side of his face. It doesn't help much in gauging Pran's expression, but Pat can tell by his upright shoulders that he's trying to keep himself together.

And Pat wants to do his best to keep him from falling apart.

But he can't help Korn's words from doing circles in his brain.

What if Pran's lying?

Pat knows Pran well enough to know that he'd never repress his emotions. Sure he'll hide them with smirks and harsh words, but either his eyes call him out, or a simple dimple does.

Pran knows exactly what he's feeling and he'd rather lie than let anyone see the truth.

And Pat's always wanted to see the truth.

He just needs to find the right way to get it out of him.

Words have never been their strong suit. Or, at least when it comes to Pran giving any leeway to Pat. He either has to lie, or blame his sister, or give Pran back something precious in order to keep the peace between them.

And Pat's already given him his guitar.

So he tries something that's never worked before, hoping that maybe now, after what they've learned, Pran is more open to responding with the same amount of honesty Pat's always been able to give him.

"I don't know if I can kiss you and have it mean nothing," Pat admits, his voice steady and shaky all at once.

Pran turns to him, his face wet, and his eyes seeing Pat more than they ever have before. It's almost like he's not looking through him, but looking in him, past the blood and the veins and seeing his soul.