Qurbat

|15|

"Salalah? What is there?" A frown on her face deepened as she heard him.

"My mother is an Omani."

"So you're about to leave?"

"Yes," His answers were firm as he played with the petal he took with him from Adil's grave.

"So what is keeping you back?"

What is keeping me back– a question that recurred in his mind after hearing about his death. Adil was not there anymore and there was absolutely nothing to hold him back. But he wished. He was willingly staying back even though there was nothing left. He could leave the investigation to anyone or just close it with a statement that they failed. He could close it but what about leaving. Could he leave now, leaving her alone in the mess he had created? Could he leave now since a psychopath is hell bent on ruining her life? Could he leave now when his longing met a destination and he had her before his eyes? Could he leave now that he was neck deep in love?

He, ever so meticulously, lifted his gaze and turned it to her direction– to see her face– showing almost nothing. But he was in a place that could see through the nothing she had pasted on her face. He could hear her heart pounding slowly in her chest. His eyes unwavering even though there was guilt that stayed afloat. What would she do if she knew what he was doing? She trusted him after not trusting anyone in years. She found a friend in him after she had been alone for years. And he saw a rooted affection in her after she was made aware of the past.

"I don't want to know."

~

On returning to the hospital, he found Khalid sahb, Sayrah and Isaa sitting in the waiting lounge, waiting for him. He mouthed curses under his breath now that he knew he was caught escaping from the hospital. The numbness in his hand was growing to an extent where he couldn't feel his arm below his elbows. He hissed when he slapped on it and felt nothing in return and then the fingers of his left hand went around a pole to feel the coldness and he couldn't feel it. He threw his hand on his side, his right hand going over his hair to fix them in place as he walked over to where they were waiting.

"Itna sab ho gaya aur tum ne kya samjha hua hai, Fayd?" Khalid sahb bawled the moment Fayd walked into his sight.

"What happened?" He looked to Isaa and then looked back at Khalid sahb to see him seethe in anger.

"Tum ne yahan se jaane ki jurrat kaise ki?"

"Main coma me tha, mere taangain nahi toote aur main chal sakta hon." He looked deadpanned, staring at the elder.

"Adil jaate jaate apni zaban de kar gaya hai kya?" Isaa hissed at how his younger brother was mentioned. A notorious officer that ran a mouth.

Fayd glared at Isaa as he spoke, "Aap log agar rai ka paharh nahi bhi banate toh main khud hi aa jaata. Main bhaga nahi tha Khalid sahb, mujhe apne dost ko dekhna tha." Holding his fist into his pocket, Fayd strode away to look for his room. He wanted to be alone and be done with their drama already. He had had enough for the day.

His head going back to the words he had said to Ayat and she had said to him. Ayat– a woman he had always wished to find again. A woman he wanted to get to know. A woman who was like a butterfly to his illusions. A woman who was alive in his every breath. He carried a part of that woman near his heart as he walked around on the surface of the earth but never, for once, did he think this was the same woman– the girl– that sat high on her company. She was right under his nose and he couldn't find her.

"Kya kar rahe ho yaar Fayd."

"Kya kar raha hon." He eyed Isaa for a second before going to sit on the bed and unstrapping his watch from his arm and laid down as his head started to throb in pain. He had seen enough for the day and he was not going to let anyone disturb the little sanity he was holding back in.