HOWL | REMUS LUPIN

THIRTY-EIGHT

- CHAPTER 38 -

❝Do you remember anything?❞

The Potter Manor, post war.

REMUS LUPIN had tried his best to stay calm. Even though it was Phoenyx who had recently gotten bit, it felt as though the boy was reliving the pain all over again.

Phoenyx would always tell Remus how beautiful he is, inside and out. She would always tell him that his lycanthropy is not a curse, it's a part of his beauty.

But now, even looking at the mirror herself was a hard task for the young girl. Of course, she still believed Remus deserved the whole world.

But about herself? She wasn't so sure.

"Nyx, you've got to eat," said Remus with a frown.

For the past few days, Remus has had to help the girl eat as much as she could. At first, she wouldn't eat anything at all. Now, slowly but surely, she was starting to eat more and more every single day.

"I can't Remus."

With a loud sigh, Remus sat next to the girl on her bed, leaving the plate on the bedside table. Taking her hand in his, Remus looked at her with worried eyes.

"Tell me what's wrong Nyx. A-Are you disgusted by it?"

At this point, Remus was not talking about the food, but rather the lycanthropy that had engulfed the two in self hatred.

"No, no of course not. I just, I always wanted to be there for you. But now, I've got to handle it too."

The boy looked at his girlfriend with a fond smile. He was absolutely smitten by her. Everything she said was like a melody to him.

A melody that he could listen to for hours and hours on end without a single break in between.

"We'll get through it together, okay?" he said while holding her face in his hands.

For the past few years, Phoenyx had tried her absolute best to help Remus change his feelings about himself.

And now, after all that time, it was his turn to do the same for his little Nyx. No matter how many days or hours would pass, he would continue to be by her side through it all.

For the next few days, the two continued forward on their journey to change. And when the full moon had showed up, it was as if everything had reset.

And just like every other time, Remus spent his night in hopelessness once more. Only this time, his Nyx was not there to comfort him. Only this time, Phoenyx was drowning in immense pain, just like he always had.

"Remus," the girl cried with tears.

"Hey, it'll be okay."

The whole night, Phoenyx had stayed at one spot while trying to recover from the pain. And as soon as it had started to go away, the transformation had began once more.

And throughout the whole night, Remus had sat next to the girl without moving a single inch. No matter how many times Sirius would bark, or how many times James would try and push him, he would not move.

His wolf was fascinated to see someone his own kind. But at the same time, he was also very worried. It was as if Remus was there himself. He could sense that his Phoenyx was in pain, and could not handle it at all.

"Do you remember anything?" she asked with a painful groan.

"No, not really," he lied through his teeth.

All his life, whenever he would transform, Remus would never remember anything from the night before.

However, this specific night, the girl's screams and howls of pain had engraved themselves in the deepest parts of his mind.

Since it was her first time transforming, everything was a lot more painful for her. And for Remus, every time she would get hurt, he would too.

One thing that Remus had always hated was seeing Phoenyx in pain. He would always think to himself— hey, that's my job!

He would try countless of things to make her feel better. Sneak out of bed late at night, go get her favourite sweets from the kitchens all alone, he would've never done that for anyone else.

With Phoenyx, Remus was a completely different person. When he is with her, his top priority would always be her happiness. And for that, he is willing to jump off a mountain if you'd tell him to.

"We've brought the bandages! Oh, and we also brought some cake."