Stellatrix One-shots

The Weight Of Secrets (Part 1)

"What are you saying?" She asked, trying to keep her voice from trembling. "I'm saying, that I think, maybe we aren't working anymore." They both let that sink in for a few seconds. A tear slipped out of Stella's eye and ran down her cheek. "Can't we fix this somehow?" Stella asked. She slowly stepped forward, afraid that Beatrix would move away from her again but she didn't. "I don't know how. Have you any idea how I've been feeling these past months?" Beatrix replied. Her eyes were now, too, dangerously shimmering. Stella shook her head.

"I felt... Worthless. Like I don't mean anything. Like I'm just a toy to play around with when you're bored and no one is looking. And it makes me feel pathetic, because I still love you and let you treat me that way." Beatrix said. Stella flinched at that. Beatrix had never been that vulnerable with her. She hadn't realized how much her behavior had really hurt the redhead and now she felt awful. "I'm sorry I made you feel like that. I didn't realize that and I certainly didn't mean to make you feel like that." Stella said.

"Your sorry doesn't suffice here Stella. I know you didn't mean it like that but I can't do it anymore. I want to be able to hold your hand whenever I want to and a want to kiss you not matter where we are or who is around us and I want to spend time with you and go on dates with you, without you worrying that anyone will notice, and I want to be able to hug you, not just in our rooms. I want a girlfriend, Stella." Beatrix said. Tears were now running down both of their cheeks. "So what do you expect me to do?" Stella said. "I don't know Stella! Tell your mother about us or stop worrying about her finding out or..." Beatrix voice broke. "Or break up with me, because I can't go on like this." she said. Stella inhaled the air sharply.

"I don't want to break up with you, Bea..." Stella cried. "God do you think I want you to break up with me? No I don't fucking want that but Stella don't you see that this can't go on like this?" Beatrix said brokenly. "Beatrix I can't tell her. You know how she is. I'm the princess. She wouldn't accept this. She'd take me back home or punish us or something like that. I can't tell her." Stella said, more tears falling down. "Then we both know what has to happen now." Beatrix cried. Stella, violently shook her head. This couldn't be happening. How could they go from holding hands in the hallway to... Well this. "No!" Stella choked out. "Stella please. Don't you see the way it is now is hurting me?" Beatrix whispered. "I know." Stella replied. More tears fell out of her eyes. She knew Beatrix was right, even though she didn't want her to be right.

"Can I hug you?" She asked. She didn't voice the "one last time" but it hung heavily in the air. As more tears ran down Beatrix' cheeks she couldn't answer so she just nodded instead. In seconds Stella had pulled her closer and they collided in a hug with such a force that it knocked the air out of both of them. They clung to each other like they were drowning, not ready to loose each other, crying together.

Then, Stella moved her hands from Beatrix' waist to her cheeks and pulled her into a kiss. Beatrix immediately responded. The kiss was slow and soft and tasted like salt from all their tears but they didn't care. The kiss ended, after what will always feel too short but actually had been a small eternity, with their foreheads pressed together and their arms around each other, neither wanting to let go because they both knew that it would be over then and they didn't want that to be real. "I love you." Stella whispered. "I know." Beatrix answered. She didn't dare to say it back this time. This was hard enough.

"I should probably go." Beatrix said after a while. Her voice was rough and thin but she tried her best to keep it steady. Stella said nothing. She couldn't bring herself to agree and she knew she had no right to say something against it. So she stayed quiet. They slowly pulled away from each other and Beatrix walked to the door. With one last look towards Stella, she left the room.

In that moment it was as if someone had cut the strings, holding Stella upright. She crumpled to the floor, her knees hitting the ground, as a sob racked through her. A door creaked and Stella looked up. All of her suite mates stood in front of her. Apparently they had been lounging around in Bloom and Aisha's room when Beatrix and her had entered the suite and heard every little word. In a few big steps Bloom was next to her.

"Oh Stella." She whispered and pulled the light fairy into a hug. That's when Stella completely broke down. She clung to Bloom and grabbed a fistful of the redheads shirt while she sobbed into her shoulder. Soon all the other's had joined them and they sat on the ground huddled up in a big hug, trying to calm Stella down.

On the other side of the school Riven was disturbed by a loud knock. Annoyed he swung his legs over the edge of his bed and walked to the door, ready to snap at whoever was in front of it. However his gaze immediately softened, the second he saw Beatrix standing there, before it quickly changed to worry as he saw the tear tracks on her face.

"What the hell happened, who do I need to kill?" He asked as he stepped to the side and let her enter his room. Beatrix opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. Fresh tears began to spill over her cheeks. Rivens forehead furrowed in worry. He had never seen her like that. "Hey B, you need to tell me what happened, okay? Otherwise I can't help you." He said and placed his hands on her arms.

"Stella and I, we... We broke up." She choked out. Rivens face fell immediately. So this was really, really bad. "Oh B, I'm sorry." He said softly and pulled her into a hug. "Wanna talk about it?" He asked. She shook her head against his chest and a sob quickly followed. "Alright, that's fine. Whenever you're ready, just tell me." He said and let her continue to cry into his shirt.