Devour || AU VegasPete Fanfic

Chapter 17: A Bad Date (Arm×Pol Side Story)

"You look... nice," he poorly managed to get out. Arm immediately frowned and looked back at his outfit.

"Does this look bad? Should I change?" he asked Pol.

Shit!

"No!" Pol rushed to correct himself. "I mean it. You look nice. This suits you. I wish I had thought of a better outfit for myself."

Two minutes together and he had already managed to make Arm insecure about his outfit. Off to a great start!

Arm smiled at him before saying, "I always liked pink on you. It compliments your features very well."

Pol didn't know what to say to that. What did one say to that? To a perfect compliment like that?

That was Arm though. That was the reason why Pol liked him as much as he did. Arm was near-perfect. He always knew what to say and what to do. That was why Pol depended on him as much as he did. If someone knew Pol—really knew him, it was Arm.

Pol wondered—he had a lot of time to wonder and ponder about himself and Arm while the kids in gym class ran around the field—if that was the reason why he had these feelings for Arm all of a sudden. He also wondered if his feelings weren't real or if he was just confused. He wondered about all the worst questions and possibilities but his idea of his emotions didn't change.

Pol had come to one conclusion after a lot of thinking. He was always attracted to Arm. Maybe even other men. But he just never got the push he needed for the realization to dawn upon him.

He grew up in a small religious town that was hardly a thousand souls stronger. So people there didn't take unorthodoxy keenly. Therefore, whatever desires he might have had growing up—he gaslighted himself into dismissing them.

So when he went to college and met Arm, he wasn't able to distinguish his feelings from friendship. But it was always there—that emotion he felt toward Arm. Like how he would get anxious if Arm didn't talk to him for an extended period, or went on dates, or got close to someone else. Like how he would feel inside when Arm laughed at his jokes, or took care of him, or he took care of Arm. Like how he would feel when Arm relied on him for things and trusted him more than anyone else.

But Pol dismissed these feelings thinking they were normal things one might feel toward their friends. And when it was true to some extent, Pol never felt these emotions as strongly toward Yumi, Pete, or Porsche. Yes, he loved all those people a lot too. But it was still different with Arm. And when his conscience wouldn't stop nagging him, he gaslighted himself again into believing that the only reason he felt the pull toward Arm was that they were best friends.

Why he was so adamant to accept himself and his desires? Pol still didn't have the answer to that. If he had just realized what he had been doing to himself a few years ago, life would have been so much easier. He could be with Arm for so much longer. They could have worked this out long ago.

"So where are you taking me?" Arm asked as they both walked on the sidewalk. The morning was bustling. People were headed to work or just busy with their lives.

Pol smiled at the question. "I thought we could take a small trip down memory lane."

Arm looked at him with questioning eyes, his spectacles shining a little in the morning light. Pol always thought he looked so cute in glasses. Should he have told him that?

Pol had been itching to hold Arm's hand since he saw him. Heck, he wanted to hug Arm for ten minutes straight. But he felt too shy to ask. What if Arm thought he was being extra weird? He didn't want Arm to feel uncomfortable around him.

"I have picked three locations where we will go. These three places have a special contribution to forming our friendship in college. We also have spent a lot of time in these places. So I thought it would be nice to have some nostalgia too."